I screwed things up. How do I reconnect with her?

last SG · 2012-12-10T12:58:13+00:00

I know what I've done wrong and really wanted to see her, talk to her again.I know you guys will say don't sweat it but it's just how I am. Whenever I picked...

Lord dejavu SG

simply put, you missed a penalty. but there’s nothing wrong with that because even messi misses from time to time. keep making runs into the box and take players on and soon your chance will come again.

StarryLight11 SG

Hello crazyheart.

Just to tell u my opinion. I do feel that u should perhaps start by talking to her again. Maybe if u are not too ready to go to the main topic of dating her, u could try by initating a small talk like "Hey, hows your day?" and see how she replies, and try to continue the convo.. Maybe after a few times u and her have "warmed up" a little, try asking her out. Whatsapp or call is up to u, if she still hv feelings for u no matter which method (as long as not too rude) she will agree. If u know her schedule it would be best, just in case u ask at a wrong time and she's not free and u mistaken it as rejection. try to ask around, maybe get some info from the mutual fren u spoke about. Hv a small tea break at some random cafe with not too many ppl, chat her up, and tell her the truth and look at her in the eye when doing it and ASK HER TO BE YOUR GF.

Or go out to watch some movie tgt if possible, preferably funny ones so u guys will hv more common topics and happy moments.

As said u must act quick in case some other random guy take the chance from you and u can only regret for the rest of your life. If there are other "hunters" out there at her workplace they will seize the chance to make her their's.

Those are my life lessons as till now i'm still in regret.

Good luck mate.

StarryLight11

Angjaydyn SG

how's it going?

tell her you remember that day when she said her feelings for you were more than friends
then tell her how you have been feeling now. that u missed her etc
say sorry that you have only realised until now
then tell her you are hoping to see her
and that you will wait for her reply
tell her if she doesn't reply, you will understand

don't be afraid ;)

becalm SG

how's it going?

don't be afraid ;)

Yeah TS how r things? Feel free to update us! :)

crazyheart SG

Yeah TS how r things? Feel free to update us! :)

Thank you everyone for helping me more than I had expected and sorry for my disapearance.

I sent her a text couple days ago just to check out on how shes doing. Her reply was normal like before as if nothing happened. I don't know it's a good sign or it's that she doesn' care anymore because I heard from one of our mutual friends that looks like she is getting more close to a guy who is also our mutual friend and no doubt he's been attracted to her for long time. She is not at all a flirt I'm sure but I know that she is no short of guys hitting on her so my chance can be slim. I will ask her out but I think I will need to warm up a bit first before doing that perhaps two, theree weeks or so.

crazyheart SG

However, to ease the awkwardness, you might want to surface your intention that you want to know her better as a friend willingly and see if that picks up.

Hence, if you have decide to pursue this option, you would naturally need to be more rejection resistant and yet be mindful of proceeding in a comfortable pace.

At least I'm hoping we still can be friends. I can't stand the thoughts that I might lose her, even as a friend.

I know my weaknesses, it's the wound I carried over from the past and it's fear of failure as you said that's why I find it hard to make a move. Sometimes I felt my heartbeat so strong and wanted to do something crazily for her, after a few minutes, I would try to calm me down and thought whatever, what comes will come. It's always been that way and I don't know how to get out of this contradiction between the heart and the mind.

crazyheart SG

Ask her if she is still interested to meet up with you after work.

If she is not taken by another man, offer to pick her up from work and buy her dinner !

If she reject, slap yourself silly and cry yourself to sleep, tomorrow is a new day.

Asking her to meet up after work so it sounds more casual and less awkward, right? Or I should try weekend?

becalm SG

Thank you everyone for helping me more than I had expected and sorry for my disapearance.

Her text was normal that didn't indicate whether she is still interested in you or not but you are so lucky at least she didn't give you a cold shoulder or totally ignore you like some girls would do that's good to restart things with her.

But there, told you if you don't grab your chance other guys may steal from you. This is time she is perhaps going through some emotional struggle so she will become open and get closer to someone who is there for her. Be warned!

You may take some time to ask her out later but keep conversations with her going on just so she knows you are still there for her or also think about her.

becalm SG

At least I'm hoping we still can be friends. I can't stand the thoughts that I might lose her, even as a friend.

Fear of failure, fear of rejection?!! What do many of you guys these days think really? She showed her interest, she asked you out, she confessed to you that's something I actually admire and honestly if I was her, I would have never set my eyes on you again if I knew you like me but you never moved your a** to let it show. I'm curious how long she's been keeping her hope about you when you never asked her out and even turned her down. That's tiring and boring. Sorry TS to sound harsh but she deserves much better.

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