Think My Wife Is Having Affair

last SG · 2011-11-27T19:22:00+00:00

I am of the opinion there is no ’’solution’’ until self-honesty intuits and is communicated or expressed to each other in spite of the fears or ….Otherwise,...

Cash Lee SG

i'm not so sure what make you think that i had neglected her and resented her in the past. It's not only this year that i tried to do my part to keep this marriage.

Our 1st 2 years of marriage was wonderfull. We brought up our daugther together. We both played our parts as parents to take care of our daugther. She took 1 year off from work after the birth of our daughter. I woke up at nights to feed our baby.The 1st year was tough but it was also fun and rewarding. As my parents helps to take care of our daughter, we still have quite a lot of time to ourselves. During our 2nd year of marriage, which was last year, we managed to go for tour together, just the 2 of us, 3 times alltogether, to Japan, Hawaii and Australia. We had great times. I don't earn much, but last year i still got her a LV bag for our anniversary and a Tag Huer watch for her birthday. This year Prada bag for her birthday and Jimmy Choo shoe for our anniversary. Last year we went for movies together at least 8-9 times, strolling on the beach together many times and attended Zouk Out and Xmas parties together.

Things started to changed gradually when she started work with this new company early this year. At first she even brought me to attend her company functions or outings. That's how i get to know many of her colleagues including that guy who i now suspect is having affair with her now. For the last few months, things got increasingly worse. She comes home later and later and spends more and more weekends not at home. Now she doesn't want to go out with me even when i asked her.

Traditionally old folks said never buy shoe for your spouse. So isit superstitious or coincidence?

white.jewel SG

I'm a married man with a

3 years old daughter.

I suspect that my wife is having an affair with a colleague of hers.

I realized that since several months ago, she has been spending a lot of time with her male colleague. He sends her to work and send her home from work everyday. She comes home late every night and claims that she needs to work overtime. She also goes out and only comes home late at nights or early mornings on weekends.

She spends little time at home and we seldom have time to talk. Her work also requires her to travel overseas frequently and i know that on many trips, she went with that colleague.

I'm at lost now and not sure what to do. Can someone give me some opinion or advice.

If you have done your all to salvage the marriage but the results are futile, cut the losses and move on. You can find a support group like this one when you are healed :

http://www.meetup.com/find/?keywords=single+parents&mcId=&mcName=&lat=&lon=&userFreeform=singapore&gcResults=Singapore%3ASG%3Anull%3Anull%3Anull%3Anull%3Anull%3A1.352083%3A103.819836&op=search&resetgeo=true&events=

angel7030 SG

Traditionally old folks said never buy shoe for your spouse. So isit superstitious or coincidence?

Yes, it is true, but you can still buy slipper, or slip on type of slipper like croc. But if you really need to buy, buy Nike, cos it got the blessing of it logo indicating a pass sign. Just do it.

Dalforce 1941 SG

If you have done your all to salvage the marriage but the results are futile, cut the losses and move on.

Ya, just end it cleanly and move on.

Few men can stand wife sleeping with other men. I think also feel like vomiting.

Such filth.

angel7030 SG

Ya, just end it cleanly and move on.

Few men can stand wife sleeping with other men. I think also feel like vomiting.

Such filth.

But got men still want to sleep with filth, such men become more filthy

DailyFreeGames.com SG

My heart tanked when I read the whole thing. I cannot imagine how bad it felt. I wish we could publicly shame "The Manager".

I feel for Jlsky70. I hope things get better and also after divorce, it's a good opportunity to find a better/prettier/love you more girl.

i think in life, bad things do happen to good people, but you have to look at the positives from the situation.

that manager is a bloody asshole.

Fugazzi SG

Jlsky70
If u want custody of your daughter, remember that most lawyers are dishonest and promise u wht they know the courts cannot and wont deliver.
To prove adultery, u need ample proof and evidence and moreover the court will decide whether she is unfit to be a mother or play the role of …. All talk without irrefutable evidence amounts to nothing. U need to prove that she is unfit to be a mother, adultery is not good enough.
All said and done, the court gives precedence to the child’s welfare and well-being and the whimiscial ego-tripping ways of the two adults are discounted!

angel7030 SG

And also, our women charter will alway fight for our rights, and most court will go for the mother if she is able to work and bring her up, so you may be fighting a losing case in the custody of your daughter.

Like one of my aunty, she chopped her husband lots of money, then go flirt and enjoy herself, got a son, the husband decided to divorce her and get top lawyer to fight for the custody of the son, he said it is a 50- 50% chance, but you know what the judge told him in the first hearing "Mr Kenny Soh, can the court have your evidences in claiming your right to the custody" This sentence alone tells you that even before the court proceed, the son is with the mother, the father job is to get lawyers and fight all the way to get it back.

mancha SG

...

All said and done, the court gives precedence to the child’s welfare and well-being ...

The judge looks, hears, and then think, and then decide who he thinks is the best.

Fugazzi SG

Ts made a big mistake and that was of coming out in the open with the spouse and now it is kinda of too late to prove adultery. He could have hired a PI and file for divorce on the gounds of adultery and being a irresponsible parent. That would allow for leveragingng and impact the outcome of the proceedings.

Now, it does not feel so – yes,Mancha, they would listen, hear and think but this being singapore, kiasuism is awash and the judges would always stick to the rule of law and most probably fall back on precedents. Nothing that is uttered verbally is going to be considered unless incontrovertible proof and irrefutable from any angle is furnished and only then would such evidence be accepted by the courts.

Only judges of the High Court or Appelate judges risk creating law anew!

I had an acquaintance and he did his homework – got the PI and sprang a surprise during the preliminary hearing(s), the spuouse relented and gave up sole custody. Before that she was adamant and wanted sole custody.

Nothing that is uttered is going to be considered unless incontrovertible proof and irrefutable from any angle is accepted by the courts.

DailyFreeGames.com SG

very unfair hor, the singapore courts... always side women... where is the justice like that...

mancha SG

That is the justice, lor.

Just follow law.

angel7030 SG

very unfair hor, the singapore courts... always side women... where is the justice like that...

Justice, then men go niteclub enjoy leaving poor wifeys with kids to care, justice??

then men bluff go overseawork instead go flirt and see their mistresses, leaving lau por at home having to work to support the family, care for the children and his parents, justice??

then men go walking from lor 2 to lor 38 looking for chicks leaving lau por month without sex and still faithful to their husband, justice??

then men go drunk or fail in life, beat wife, called her bitch and exploited her, but she still stay loyal and faithful to her, justice?

Jlsky70 SG

I've talk to my divorce lawyer and he told me that my chance of getting child custody is lower than my wife's chance unless i can convince the judge that she is not able or not suitable to take care of my daughter physically, emotionally and financially. Financially she has no problem as she earns more than me.

Demon Bane SG

Hi Jlsky70, I think your problem is not gonna be solved by divorce....why dun you give her and yourself another chance to be together again (think about your daughter)....living without a father or a mother can be detrimental to a child's psychology...Is there no other way ?

angel7030 SG

As i said before, before any divorce proceeding, the rule of thumb is that the child is with the wife, as husband, you job is to find evidences to support your claim to get it back. Wife having Affair is not a good excuse or reason to have your child back to you, the court do not rule affair as a fault in the laws, it is a freedom of association.

Your wife, who is working and able to support the child, will in return, seek alimony from you, meaning you have to pay monthly $$ maintenances to support her and that you also cannot see the child unless she agreed on certain days.

angel7030 SG

That's why, as a counsellor, I alway advice gals and guys to open their eyes in relationship and marriage, see further than what the pink roses and CK brief promised today.

Demon Bane SG

I think best talk over the thingy again....if you lose your case, you'll "lose" your daughter leh...

maxsee SG

Conclusion for men best not to get married unless u too much extra cash in pocket to donate in the event the marriage fail...for women good luck in finding more carrot heads to chop for money....

Demon Bane SG

That's why, as a counsellor, I alway advice gals and guys to open their eyes in relationship and marriage, see further than what the pink roses and CK brief promised today.

Sometimes its so hard to see beyond when infatuation sets in...people get married for the wrong cause....then divorced later .... Aiyah, dun get married better for some people...

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