Today I had another quarrel with my dad. The
feeling is so bad that I had to find a way to vent my anger and
sadness. Guess one way is to pen this down.
Since young, my dad don’t bother to take care of
mum, brother and me. We had been staying with grandma and taken
care of by grandma since we were born till the age of 12. It was
then that we were seen as old enough to work that we were brought
back to stay with dad. Since then we were forced to work in dad’s
shop and earn our own living. Working after school till 8pm and
earning a tiny $3 a day. Dad was never in the shop to help out,
only collecting money at end of the day. My days only got better
when I got fed up and signed up with the SAF’s at the age of 16. My
dad did not want to pay for my school fee and therefore I had no
choice but to seek SAF’s sponsorship for my diploma and earning a
monthly allowance at the same time.
Feeling grateful of what SAF had provided me, I
worked hard in the SAF and was promoted along the way. Things got
even better when I was given the opportunity to study in
UK.
During my studies, I read a lot of Buddhist
teachings which always remind to be forgiving and providing for
your parents. Even though I kind of hated my dad, I still believe
that I should provide for my parents with what I can afford. So I
suggested having our whole family pool our savings together (Bro,
me and dad each paying 33.33%) to purchase a condo and the rental
will be given to mum and dad. Dad readily took up the offer, we
purchased the condo, but he took the entire rental without sharing
with mum. Know his greedy nature, we just let him be.
Years passed and I returned to Singapore. I found
my true love in UK and we were preparing to get married. The condo
had appreciated more than $200k and I suggested to sell the condo
at this high price to share the profit and thereafter we can buy
again when the economy goes down again. But dad do not bother with
my wedding, he is more concerned with losing the rental then
sharing the profits first and helping me in my wedding. His reason
in not selling, he did not take good care of us since young and he
can trust no one in the world to provide for him!
Mum was so angry with him that she silently told
me that she will help me with her $30k of private savings. But this
was found out by dad when he saw mum’s messages in my
phone.
After much quarreling, he suddenly agreed to loan
me 60k (of which he took mum’s $30k and claimed as his own) and
that I have to return the entire 60k to his own account. To this,
mum and I conceded.
Days passed and (for 5 months) almost every
fortnights dad would ask on when will the 60k be returned or that I
need to buy new household item like washing machines, pay bills for
him.
Today, 10 Dec 2011, he got worst! He actually
asked me to take the maximum cash-out housing loan to repay him the
60k (of which 30k is not his) and the rest must be kept by him for
his personal purchase of shop house and more rental for himself!
The reason being he needs to look after himself and there are so
many news saying children are not taking care of their
parents!
But thinking aloud myself, did dad ever treat us
as his children?
-The sorrow one
