...But this
had subtle results; it made women more independent and more
outspoken.
Bourgeois men gradually came to live under a regime of
persistent nagging to become "better
providers."
To many men, work became a refuge and a relief from domestic
revelations of the inadequacy of their performance as economic
achievers.
This growth of
overwork, of constant tension, of frustration of emotional life and
of leisure began to make more and more men
increasingly willing to accept death as the only method of
achieving rest.
Bourgeois men literally began to kill themselves, by unconscious
psychic suicide, from overwork, neurotic overindulgence in alcohol,
smoking, work, and violent leisure, and the middle class slowly increased its
proportion of materially endowed widows.
One notable change in this whole
process was a
shift, over the past century, from the
male-dominated family to a female-dominated family.
The locality in which the young couple set up their home had an
increasing tendency to be matrilocal rather than patrilocal.
In increasing numbers of cases, where the young couple married
before the groom's educational process was finished, they even
lived with her family (but very rarely with his family).
Increasingly
part of the burden of housework was shifted to the
husband: washing dishes, buying groceries, even
tending the children.
In 1840 a child could cry at night and would invariably be
tended by its mother, while the father slept peacefully on, totally
unaware of what was going on.
By 1960, if a child cried at night, the chances were as likely
as not that the mother would hear nothing while the father took
over the necessary activities.
If this were questioned by anyone, the mother's retort was
pointed: "I take
care of baby all day; I don't see why he can't take care of it at
night!".
Closely related to this confusion, or even
reversal, of the social roles of the sexes was
decreasing sexual differentiation in child-rearing practices.
As recently as
the 1920's girl babies were reared differently from
boys.
They were dressed differently, treated differently, permitted to
do different things, and admonished about different dangers.
By 1960,
children, regardless of sex, were all being brought up the
same.
Indeed, with short cropped hair and play-suits on both, it
became impossible to be sure which was which.
This led to a
decrease in the personality differences of men and
women, with males becoming more submissive and
females more aggressive.
This tendency was
accelerated by
new techniques of education, especially in the first twelve years
of life.
The neurological maturation of girls was faster shall that of
boys, especially in regard to coordination, such as in feeding
oneself, talking, dressing oneself, toilet-training, learning to
read, and general adjustment to school.
The shift from
home to school in the early grades was adjusted to by girls more
easily than by boys, partly because girls were more
self-assured and gregarious.
By the age of ten or twelve, girls were developed physically,
neurologically, emotionally, and socially about two years in
advance of boys.
All this tended to make boys less self-assured, indecisive,
weak, and dependent.
The steady increase in the percentage of women teachers in the
lower grades worked in the same direction, since women teachers
favored girls and praised those attitudes and techniques that were
more natural to girls.
New methods, such as the whole-word method of teaching reading
or the use of true-and-false or multiple-choice examinations, were
also better adapted to female than to masculine talents.
Less and less
emphasis was placed on critical judgment, while more and more was
placed on intuitive or subjective decisions.
In this environment girls did better, and boys felt inferior or
decided that school was a place for girls and not for boys.
The growing
aggressiveness of girls pushed these hesitant boys aside and
intensified the problem.
As consequences of this, boys had twice as many "non-readers" as
girls, several times as many stutterers, and many times as many
teen-age bed-wetters.
While the outside world was
decreasing its differential treatment of children on a sexual basis
by treating boys and girls more and more alike (and that treatment
was better adapted to girls than to boys) within the middle-class
home, the growing
emotional frustrations of the mother were leading to an increasing
distinction on a sexual basis in her emotional treatment of her
children...
http://real-world-news.org/bk-quigley/20.html#75
In the nineteenth century three things came fairly close
together in the fifteen to seventeen age
bracket:
(1) sexual awareness;
(2) emotional readiness for sex; and
(3) the ending of education and the opportunity to seek economic
independence from parents.
Today sexual awareness comes very early for all, perhaps around
the age of ten.
Emotional readiness to face the fact of one's own sexuality
comes earlier and earlier for the girl today, but later and later
for the boy, chiefly because the middle-class mother forces
independence and recognition of the fact that she is a woman upon
her daughter but forces dependence and blindness to the fact that
he is a man upon her son.
And the date
for the ending of education and seeking economic independence from
parents gets somewhat later for girls but immensely later for men
(a process that becomes increasingly
extravagant).
One result of this is that the
much greater (sometimes indefinitely postponed) delay for a boy of
emotional readiness after sexual awareness leaves
the boy
emotionally desexed for so long that it affects his sexuality and
emotional maturity adversely and to an increasingly advanced
age. But the opposite is true for a girl, because
of the shorter and decreasing lag of her emotional readiness after
her sexual awareness.
Lolita, who is not as rare as the readers of that novel wanted
to imagine, becomes increasingly frequent, and cannot be satisfied by boys of her
own age; consequently she seeks for many reasons,
including financial resources and greater emotional maturity, her
sex companions among older men.
On the other hand,
the position of
the middle-class boy becomes even more complex and
pitiful...
Dalforce.. stop reading those kinda crap lah.
if you want the historical truth about the evolution of men and
women throughout history , go and read Will Durant- Story of
Civilisation.
There you can understand why and how in it's entirety.
