Missus,
OK, so you're a scatterbrain or ditzy. How long have you been
like this ?
Are you always like this only when both of you have fights ?
Or do you become this way whenever you have too much things on
your mind ?
It's unlikely you are like this every minute of you life..else
it be a miracle you actually survived till adulthood.
Your husband probably didn't mind your ditziness during
courtship, he probably thinks you were "cute", "innocent" and
requires his "knightly help".
But now that you are his wife, his expectation is different.
You will become the mother of his children, the one to take care
of his needs when he can no longer take care of himself, the one he
needs to RELY on during his times of need.
But can he be confident of a ditzy, scatterbrain if his life
depends on it ? NO WAY.
What you do today is a sign of things to come ( that's what he
is fearful of).
Your promises holds no water, because I'm sure you've promised
him before to change, but didn't. He is tired of your "failures",
anybody will.
You cannot expect him to change his perception of you, but you
can do what you can to earn his confidence.
Rationalize first, be prudent, think things through, consider
the consequences.
When your brain starts to space out again.. STOP what you are
doing and take a deep breath before you make ANY
decision/action.
If you still can't handle it yourself, go and talk to a
psychologist.
Good luck.
I have always been quite a scatterbrain. he bought me a T shirt
that says Little Miss Scatterbrain before we were married. But when
I am at work, my scatterbrain is more 'controlled'
I admit that at home, in our relationship my scatterbrain is not
as controlled after we fight, my mind will be transfixed on the
fight and unhappiness that I am not really thinking or functioning.
Yesterday I said sorry to him many times and he said my sorry
doesn't mean anything to him. I made promises before and he said
they don't hold any water to him also.
He too has faults that he should change, I don't think anyone is
perfect. So I think its not unreasonable of me to ask for time to
improve. I surely cannot do it overnight, just like how I dun think
he can control his explosive temper overnight or change his flaws -
he tends to be very affected by his mood, would react in extreme
manners by calling off plans as the mood is not ideal or if he's
feeling low.