It started in November when my bf asked me to help him check his
email when I saw he emailed a transvestite saying "Hi
Pretty...etc.etc.etc" and basically asked if she was available to
"have fun" with him before he enlisted. I asked but he said he knew
nothing of it...
Then recently, his brother showed me two chat logs with that
same person...we were already together for 7 months...then I saw
that he had started sexual talk and gave out his number and wanted
an "experience" with her.
Judging from how he treats me which is well, I'm extremely
confused now. On msn, from wat I know, even with remote
assistance..you cannot have a conversation with your friend and a
hacker supposedly using your account to talk to someone in your
contact list at the same time. I'm really hoping I'm wrong. His
comp has no firewall (I think). He claims he didn't do it...but
logically its quite impossible.
Someone help me.
The dichotomy of gender only applies
to our biological construct - in fact, our sexual orientation and
our sexual preference (being our software) can be very much
different from our biological gender. Gender is not merely man or
woman - in fact, it's across a range of spectrum because no man is
100% masculine - same goes for females and femininity.
Having established that: for those who lies within the
grey areas (bisexual), their inner struggles
often coerced them to formulate some kind of confirmation
to decide if they are indeed gay. And one
common methodology is to date the opposite gender, so as
to see if there are attraction (both sexual and
emotional) to validate this inconsistency between
they should be feeling and what they are really feeling.
It is also equally possible for him to date
someone of the opposite gender, serving as a shield towards
his real identity - part of his defense mechanism - while
having the certainity that he isn't straight
already.
Deonotological perspective might suggest that he's
blatantly cheating on you - regardless of who the online fellow is.
However, that ultimately (I reckoned) would only leave you
with the choice of leaving him.
I suggest you have a HTHT (heart-to-heart-talk) with him - but
do not begin your focal point from questioning about the
possibility of his gender crisis, for that would render you
the same level as those teasing he received from his
army mates. Use the standpoint of
honesty/truthfulness and the desire to know your other half
better.
Learn to understand first. I think there are many things about
him that you don't really know. Seek them. 
Cheers
