New Gf

Sailinna SG

New here,but i got a few questions that i need to ask.

Recently got together with a girl,well,kind of stole her from another guy la,but she loves me too,that's why i decided to ask her to be my Gf. To some of the ppl out there,she only agreed to be my gf after she broke up with her ex,we were together maybe a few days after she broke up with him.so that's why i said (kind of stole). I didn't really steal her.I went the "legal" way...

Her (ex)bf and her were having communication problems and she decided that he cudn't give her enough freedom in her life,she's in uni,(i'm her classmate now.)so we're quite young,he's working(he's much older than her) but he wants to meet her almost everyday, they have been together for less than a year but should have gone through a lot of things together more than any of her previous ones,she was really devoted to him even though they had people objecting them to be together. So for now basically she thinks that he's a bit controlling her although he loves her a lot plus always shower her with gifts and romantic surprises that she likes.And so they had a big quarrel and split up. That was when me and her started.By that time we had known each other for maybe 3plus weeks only and i did express my thoughts about her to her.But i feel that i like her a lot and that she likes me too.So i asked her to be my gf after she broke up with him and she accepted,so,we've been together for maybe one month?

We've been quite happy together going out after classes or weekends,other than the fact the ex keeps on msging her ,still calling her by her very intimate names and sending her gifts,flowers.Infront of me she never or hardly replies him la,i dun question her,but i know she sometimes,sometimes only ah,does reply him when we are not together.

There was one time maybe a couple of weeks after we were togther,that she went to meet him to have a talk,they spoke for a while.The ex didn't scold her or anything,instead did the unexpected and treated her like very well.Bought her even more things and doing heart touching things only the two of them understand,somethings that involved only their memories,so i didn't really probe.Sigh~~I think she even cried...Don't ask me how i knew what happened la,i know it happened.Just like how i know things about them that happened before,my sources are kept private.

After that day,things slightly went back to normal for us,lotsa lotsa classes and projects.I was happy.She was happy,i think. Cause her ex still msg her everyday,wanting to meet.She ignored him whenever possible and told him she was too busy to meet.She also told him she loves me a lot and just want to be friends with him for now.However,i can't help having a nagging feeling that she feels she owes him and that she is or will be regretting what happened between them one day.

Then recently days back,they met up to go out for dinner.She did tell me she was meeting him,and i was pretty ok with it la.I was not really upset or anything.I don't really know what they did,but i'm pretty sure her ex still treats her like as if they were still together.I trust her but i don't know about the other guy.He might still try to get touchy feely with her.And i think he has no intention of letting her go.My friends all tell me that the way me and her started wasn't a normal way to start a relationship and that i should really be wary of them going out.Especially when they always only go out alone.Although i know they won't do anything everytime they meet.Maybe hugs at the most,like goodbye hugs,he holding her waist ,then try to hold her hand like that. Like normally how us guys try to take advantage of girls.=)Confirm nothing more physical though.

So i got a few questions.

1)Was the way we started considered not normal?

2)Should i be upset and wary when she goes out with her ex so soon after she just broke up with him this way? Leaving him for me?Although she said that she just wants to be friends with him.

3)She says i give her the freedom that her ex couldn't give,is it a really valid reason for her to be with me (we know each other not long) or she just wants a way to escape from her boyfriend and i just happen to be there?

4)Should i let them go out again?And if she does go out with him again,how?

5)My friend she warned me that she could leave me very soon if the other guy refuses to give up.She said if my gf could leave him so quickly after knowing me for only such a short period of time,it could be just that she found something in me that she wants for now.But will go back to him once she's tired of me.Is it true?What comes fast goes even faster?She will regret breaking with him?Or she already regret?We're still quite happy together now.

6)Anyone got any similar stories or experiences to share?

jojobeach SG

New here,but i got a few questions that i need to ask.

So i got a few questions.

1)Was the way we started considered not normal?

2)Should i be upset and wary when she goes out with her ex so soon after she just broke up with him this way? Leaving him for me?Although she said that she just wants to be friends with him.

4)Should i let them go out again?And if she does go out with him again,how?

6)Anyone got any similar stories or experiences to share?

Rebound guy.

aHGer^83 SG

thru out the whole story, i dun see anything agony abt ur r/s lei...

i think main thing is the sense of security u both are giving to each other... i tink u dun feel secure every time she meet her ex... but u duwan to voice out..

charlize SG

This looks like a case of "She will go back to her ex" type situation.

Give it a few more months.

Confirm.

gigabyte14 SG

why u so stupid, go and kio sai

VagueHart SG

I got a friend like you, went with another person's GF, then end up the girl very confused and stop contacting BOTH guys, another guy came in and comforted her, he didn't jio her, he just talk to her and listen to her... end up the girl fell in love with the one who came in, but the guy say needs time and need to slowly develop their R/S.

I feel this is what you should do... instead of going in and exploiting the fact that they just quarreled and R/S is abit unstable, you should be there for her, talk to her and be there for her.. girls don't love people when they're in such situation, they're just looking for someone to hold on to.

Sailinna SG

This looks like a case of "She will go back to her ex" type situation.

Give it a few more months.

Confirm.

Actually,right now i feel we are quite stable already,she has already said she just wants to be friends with him for now. Although she had agreed to meet him every now and then, I don't see her really bothering herself with him anymore. So i don't think ("She will go back to her ex" type situation.") will happen right? She does not look like those type.

Hanagata SG

why u so stupid, go and kio sai

hahahhahaha

Bak la va SG

New here,but i got a few questions that i need to ask.

So i got a few questions.

1)Was the way we started considered not normal?

2)Should i be upset and wary when she goes out with her ex so soon after she just broke up with him this way? Leaving him for me?Although she said that she just wants to be friends with him.

4)Should i let them go out again?And if she does go out with him again,how?

6)Anyone got any similar stories or experiences to share?

My 1st relationship was like urs. I got him from another gal when the gal controlled him too much. We broke up for other reasons la.

I feel that ur girl knows what she wants. But sometimes things can be out of control. I remembered once the gal threathened to cut wrist if he wants to be with me n make a big fuss at our BBQ gathering.

The 1st u need to ask urself , do u trust her?

1)Was the way we started considered not normal?

U are normal.

2)Should i be upset and wary when she goes out with her ex so soon after she just broke up with him this way? Leaving him for me?Although she said that she just wants to be friends with him.

No need to worry. bu shi ni de jiu bu shi ni de. shi ni de jiu pao bu diao.

This is a valid reason in all relationship! Trust n Respect. Dun give freedom due to no trust.

4)Should i let them go out again?And if she does go out with him again,how?

View out our concern nicely to her, u dun mind her to meet him but u also will get jealous. Let her know your thoughts.

Can she also take it if u go out alone with ur gals' friend?

That depends on how well u know her. There will be a reason behind if she leaves u soon, right?

6)Anyone got any similar stories or experiences to share?

Shared

Short Ninja SG

I would like to say she is screwing with you and great for you but....ex bf getting some poontang how can lielat???

charlize SG

You obviously don't know what girls want.

Bak la va SG

I would like to say she is screwing with you and great for you but....ex bf getting some poontang how can lielat???

Say like this very bad leh

Sailinna SG

You obviously don't know what girls want.

Can explain?

BadzMaro SG

Dun say like this la.. charlize.. he he

Not all women want what we think they want. LoL. They may want what we think they dont want but want what they think we think they want what we think they dont want.

Thats just how it is.. its one big ass constant course correction when u captain that boat with her on board.

mightygirl SG

Girls are fickle-minded. And, I think you should be on your guards.

We won't know what her ex-bf will do to her. Be it hug or goodbye hug, it's not that nice.

That EX got the upper hand, He knows that your gf will meet up with him. Even when you are with her. That's why, he don't feel upset at all.

And, Why would you gf meet up with him still? ( A big question mark)

You need to learn how to pamper girls if you really wanna keep the r/s going.

Wishing you all the best (:

BangHong SG

Its very hard to judge from your 1sided story.

Be it whatever, you dont have a good position or good stand from what you mention.

1st, your relationship with her is not really stable, the way it started all this. The love you all built it's not strong at all, compared to your gf and her EX. They still go out equals to she had not got over him. That's what i think from the actions she did.

Do you still want to continue on? I believe the answer is yes, if i were in your shoes, i will try to walk down the path i guess. Even though its so dark..

Try talking to her, ask her to make a decisions. Tell her you dont see a need that she meet her ex so often, or go with her to meet her ex.

TalkToTheScreen SG

I had an experience like yours too.

New here,but i got a few questions that i need to ask.

Same thing, i thought it was 'legal' too. But apparently, she couldn't let go of her ex.

Same, she wanna meet up with her ex almost everyday too.

Yeah, this situation was the same as mine. She replies him, but refuses to tell me.

Oh yea, this sounds familiar.. For me, after she met up and cried, I gave up totally. There's no point continuing anymore, she couldn't be happy.

Lies, lies, lies. She can't let go. I feel that she probably treats you as a rebound guy.

Gone le, you know if you still have feelings for someone, the more you see that person, the more you can't let go?

So i got a few questions.

1)Was the way we started considered not normal?

Yeah, it's not normal. How could someone go into a relationship so fast after she broke?

2)Should i be upset and wary when she goes out with her ex so soon after she just broke up with him this way? Leaving him for me?Although she said that she just wants to be friends with him.

Be wary, being upset is normal and a sure thing.

I guess she had felt that she couldn't continue with her ex anymore (maybe cos of the communication problem?) , then it just happens you were there.This happened to me too. I had the same thought as you too.

4)Should i let them go out again?And if she does go out with him again,how?

There's no choice, you're stuck. Even if you don't let her go out with her ex, she has her own freedom to choose, and if you don't let them go out, she will feel that you aren't giving her enough freedom. That'll be a good reason for you two to quarrel over, if she treats you as the rebound guy.

This, i'm not sure. But for me, i left her. I couldn't continue with it, she just couldn't be happy in the relationship anymore. A person is supposed to be happy in a relationship isn't it? If she's happy with her ex, then let her be. I left her, and she went back to her ex.

6)Anyone got any similar stories or experiences to share?

maxsee SG

I got to say....rather matured of u to leave her...instead of trying to mess them up.....no point hanging on to her i must say.....wonder why the working guy would be going after her though.....

maxsee SG

I got to say....rather matured of u to leave her...instead of trying to mess them up.....no point hanging on to her i must say.....wonder why the working guy would be going after her though.....

gigabyte14 SG

women are good in manipulating men when in r/s

they can control you whenever they want

so, yeahhhhhhhhh

please dont kio sai, cos they will usually use you as a lifeboat, a temporary shelter, so that they will 75% run back to the previous grass where they had grazed

there is a certain forumer who has done that, but will be classified info, hur hur hur

no offense to the females, but a lot of them does this

like talking simi lanjiao still havent get over

so the guys, dont heart itchy itchy go and take the opportunity to eat some tofu, cos will not work 1

aim for some spinster who want 30k ring, hohoho

not