I have a friend whom I've known since my childhood days. She
used to stay around my area and is from the same church (I'm not
talking religion here) as me. Our parents know each other for how
many donkey years already. Her mom is my music teacher so I go to
her house every week for lessons. She's been teaching me piano for
the past 3 years and although she's quite strict on me at times ,
she said that its because she dotes on me and yes I'm really
appreciative of it.
Here's the main point. Although I kind of liked her (my teacher's
daughter) for quite some time already , I never had the guts to
strike up a conversation with her. It took me sometime to finally
strike up a conversation with her with positive results. That was
about 2 months ago. Imagine I knew her since my primary school days
and only 2 months ago did I really had a real conversation with
her!
She's a sanguine (adopted from the 4 temprements) , meaning that
she's the very outgoing , over excited , optimistic , cheerful ,
enjoys being in big groups , likes to be the "star" of the group ,
talkative etc.
I'm a melancholic , which is like the direct opposite of a sanguine
but of course I have my own friends and get along with them very
well. I'm just not very fond of being in big groups because the
bigger the group becomes , the more indecisive the group becomes.
Actually I'm a mix of a melancholic and a phlegmatic and so I do
not fully possess all the characteristics of a melancholic. But I
still see beauty in which people tend to overlook. And yes I'm a
extremely righteous person. I have this strong desire to do
something about things which I see "injustice" in.
Sorry I just can't help but mention the 4 temprements because I'm
very intrigued by it.
The thing is well 2 weeks after I first striked up a conversation
with her , she went steady with her first boyfriend. He's like 2
years younger than her. She's 17 and I'm 19. Although I was never
fond of him because I felt that he was like a typical misguided
teenager who engages in underage smoking , underage drinking and
piercings for the sake of being "cool" blindly but I just decided
not to bother so much about it. Besides my friend likes her as well
and so I just decided to sit in one corner and not let myself get
involved in this entire political scene brewing. Let these guys
settle their own problems themselves.
Barely a month into their relationship , their relationship has
come to light and practically they were like the talk of the town
among the youth groups in my church. To cut a long story short ,
her mom (my piano teacher) came to know about it but decided to
keep quiet about it. She actually accepted him secretly at first
but after one particular incident that happened , her impression of
him changed drastically. Now her mom is like forcing her to break
with him.
All these while I've given her my honest opinions of what I felt
about her relationship because I saw some "injustice" prevailing
and I felt strongly that I had to do something about it. Of course
I'm NOT NOT NOT like those idiots who go like ,"ya ya break up with
him , he's a jerk!" and then later go steady with the girl. I have
my own principles when it comes to such things. For me although I'm
not really fond of him , I gave her my reasons (in a nice way) why
I'm not really fond of him and this entire relationship thing she's
going through. As much as I really liked her , I decided to put my
feelings aside (I really mean it!) and play the role of the
concerned friend towards her.
Her mom asked me for advice pertaining to her daughter's boyfriend
and I don't know why , my righteous self took control and gave her
my honest opinions which were quite critical because I honestly
truthfully sincerely cannot find anything good about this
relationship. His level of maturity being the crux of the issue.
You know like you tell him to do some simple projecting and he'll
go like , "Aiyah I don't want to make mistakes lah....too many
powerpoint slides!" or perhaps when the folks invite him for lunch
and he'll go like ,"Aiyah it's okay lah...you go ahead without me"
ask him again in 5 minutes and he'll give another excuse like
,"Ohhhh my mom is cooking dinner for me now...."
Now that this entire issue has reach its critical point with her
mom forcing her to stay away from him. You know as much as I would
like to help her as a friend I swear tide over such forseeable
circumstances , but at the back of my head , I feel quite guilty in
that I don't know I have this feeling that I'm being the evil 3rd
party. I don't want her to think that I was the one who soured
their entire relationship with my honestly critical comments made
towards the guy and things would be worst if I ever told her I
liked her! If I told her I like her , she would probably think that
I was the evil 3rd party which caused her relationship to fall
apart! Of course I never ever I swear that I never had any evil
intentions behind my back. It's just my righteous self fighting for
"injustice" prevailing in her relationship.
Yes I like her but right now , I have put my feelings aside and
play the role of the concern friend towards her.
If she breaks up with him , of course I'll just play the role of
the concerned friend here and try my best to help her in anyway to
the best of my ability. But of course....there will come a time
where I would have to confess my feelings for her. I intend to take
this slow and being a melancholic I'm a cautious person which means
that....well.....I take things slow and easy!
But the question is , what would she think of me when the times
comes for me to confess my feelings for her?
Having said all these , I hope the kind people here would provide
me with some practical advice.
