Confessions of a Cheap Guy

last SG · 2007-01-23T15:29:05+00:00

7 years is a long time to be together. But if you are not sure of yourself and commitment, then you should break up for a while. From what I have seen, thos...

thickskin23 SG

I have a gf who been with me for 7 years, She is very nice to me. One month ago i meet another girl. I guess i was attracted by her, we had lunch and phone chats and i could tell that she like me also, i just feel comfortable with her ( We never hold hands or do other things).

However i realised i cannot carry on this anymore, so i told that girl i was just toying with her feelings. I feel so sad when i said that but i could not be bad to my gf who give 7 years of her best life to me.

Now i am still trying to get over that girl but at times i find myself at the mrt station waiting to just catch a glimpse of her.

I really wanted to tell my gf that i did something wrong, i just cannot bear to meet with her eyes when we go out. I even stop holding her hands but i feel so terrible as i had been faithful for the past 7 years, i really feel that i am cheap.

798 SG

u have to make up ur mind wat is best for u, if u decide to jump ship, make sure dat new ship is safe.

otherwise u will end up drowning.

thickskin23 SG

I made up my decision when i told that girl i was just trying to toy with her
(but thats not true, Sleeping terrfifies me now. Whenever i close my eyes, i will think of her)

798 SG

seem u decided to stick to ur current boat, u should by all means try to forget tis gal. it will be hard but time will flow n tis pain will be heal.

blu_sky SG

What about her that attracted you?

thickskin23 SG

I mean it is just a feeling that cannot be explained. She is not pretty but whenever i saw her, i feel breathless and my heart keeps on thumping. Now i don't even dare to sleep on my bed as whenever i lie down i will remember the nights i had phone chat with her.

I knew i should be faithful to my gf but now i just feel scare of having dinner with her or dating. I can sense that she also sense something is amiss

mayday80 SG

this kind of feeling can be dashed very quick sometimes wor...

most impt is... do u still love ur gf?

blu_sky SG

well, it happens. this should fade away slowly. so if you have decided to stick to your gf, just shake that feeling off whenever you think of that girl. Soon, it will fade away.

importantly, stop fantacising or thinkin of her.

thickskin23 SG

I am a terrible guy, i meet my gf when i was in poly (she is older than me). At that time i was kinda of naive and childish (i still is right now), i never woo my gf and at that time i think it will be nice to enter a relationship.

So for 7 years i never had the feelings of any heartbeat thumping or breathless, it was just smooth flowing. We never had any breakup in the middle of our relationship but whenever we quarrel, my gf will said i never love her truly before as she was the one who take the first approach.

I knew time will heal everything but i really wish to tell my gf the truth

blu_sky SG

DON'T!!!!!!

Devil1976 SG

I simply see no point for you to tell that to your gf... In doing so, what exactly are you trying to achieve? More complications? Nonetheless, she might just question you one day sooner or later if you continue to behave in such strange manners while you're with her....?

Now... Speaking of your 'unease'... I wonder why you should even be feeling that way in the 1st place? Unless you've not be totally truthful to us? If like what you've said, nothing has happened between you and the other girl... The main problem now you're facing is just dropping her behind your mind... And it's your decision yup? Since you've already taken the 1st practical step of saying you're toying with her feelings, pls do proper follow-up to take her off your mind... At this point, it's very unlikely to turn back to that girl even if you want to... So just drop any foolish thought and stick to what you've already decided and done yup?

Take it as a past and no longer there... Dilemma would leave you ending up nowhere in between...

Cool-gal SG

ahhh, dun worry. just a small crush.
dun have to tell ur gf abt it unless u wan to worsen the situation.
be truthful n make 101% sure u wont do tat again, promise?

mhcampboy SG

tsk.. seven years of relationship.. and u jeopardize everitin with ur lust! Rolling Eyes

dunno why u ppl wanna hold on to ur gf. if u like sum1 else... go break off with ur gf. dun like two ppl at the same time. its unfair for the one who is sincere to you for 7 yrs. first sign of trouble u shld back off!! not continue with conversations and dug urself ur own grave.

why cant u just stick to 1? 7 yrs... sigh... does it mean anitin to u?

thickskin23 SG

Just because its seven years that make me do this thing. I knew i should not plunged into this mess at the first signal of warning. I admit this mistake but now i just dun know how to face my gf.

I really feel so miserable as my heart was swayed

mhcampboy SG

u know wad u shld do... if u really are guilty and miserable becos of this... just be extra nice to ur gf. EXTRA nice. learn to cherish her more.

if really guilt is in u... u shld do it. u shld noe wad to do.

smudgey SG

dear TS,

Sometimes it's the fact that you know you cant have her that makes you want her even more.

what u did is right. as in to end things with that gal.

abt telling your gf, do so only when a lot of time have passed....

my Ex, he told me once that he was attracted to another gal, and that he did think about leaving me for her....

I was devastated. but i reminded myself that he chose me in the end.

and no, that was not the reason we broke up.

blu_sky SG

TS, yes, by telling your gf, it may make you feel better. But it will only cause her hurt. you want to hurt her?

mhcampboy SG

he already hurt her indirectly... Mad

blu_sky SG

ya, but what she doesnt know, cant hurt her. or is he going to tell her, making sure that she feels the hurt?

mystee SG

personally feel that "paper cant cover fire", your gf will know sooner or later. i hate it when my partner lies to me and likewise, I have my means to find out things too.

I agree that one of the post saying that you cant get over the gal "maybe" because that you cant have her. Most/ All people usually treasure things that is hard to get, or cant get it.

In the 1st place, you did the mistake, lies, hide + betray. So please dont do it again, think carefully what you want and need, and put yourself in your gf's shoes. Make a decision and stop swaying your heart. Be decisive!