I don't want to condemn you on anything, as you already know it
urself.
Just be clear, TOTALLY cut off the friendship and communication
with this guy and building new interest/hobby with ur bf.
Treasure what you have, appreciate his forgiving heart. Don't wait
until one day u cross the boundaries, then you will regret. A
relationship cannot be mend for betrayal, you are nearer to that.
you should know what you should do!
I hope below article can let you understand and wake up. Sincerely
bless you and your bf love without scar... The most perfect love
is, wake up and realize and make your current love more
perfect...
Those who are still single may learn something from here....
Those who are already married may take it as a guideline to improve
your marriage....
DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?
During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question.
She said, "How do I know if I married the right person?"
I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I
said,
"It depends. Is that your husband?"
In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"
Let me answer this question because the chances are
good that it's weighing on your mind.
Here's the answer.
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love
with
your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and
liked their idiosyncrasies.
Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was
a
completely natural and spontaneous experience.
You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in
love...
Because it's happening TO YOU.
People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about
the
imagery of that _expression. It implies that you were just
standing
there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO
YOU.
Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous
experience.
But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's
the
natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone
calls
become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome
(when
it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being
cute, drive you nuts.
The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if
you
think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference
between
the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even
angry subsequent stage.
At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I
marry
the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the
euphoria of
the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience
with
someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame
their
spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for
fulfillment.
Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity
is
the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work,a hobby,
a
friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.
But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your
marriage.
It lies within it.
I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else.
You could.
And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same
situation a
few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):
THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE
RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll
NEVER
just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to
"make" it
day in and day out. That's why we have the _expression "the labor
of love."
Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly,
it
takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage
work.
Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are
specific
things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with
your marriage.
Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity),
there
are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and
exercise
program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your
relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause
and
effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are
predictable...you can "make" love.
Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... Not just a feeling.