should I or should I not?

last SG · 2006-01-05T23:02:55+00:00

not to forget that it reali takes a lot of courage to tell the other party your feelings... regardless of gender.... so if you reali like him u gona pluck u...

Sekundes SG

let me guess if she is,
this is one show i don't wanna miss XD

FBI SG

wat? i catch no balls

nanren4ever SG

if i were u, i will not go up to him and tell him straight that i like that person. Instead, i will go look for someone who knows that person a lot, and ask that person to find out for u. So in this case, u won’t lose face, and can find out if he returns the feelings for u

foreverone87 SG

As what others have said, whether u are going by the “DO IT URSELF” or “FRIENDS”, you are taking a risk. No one can decide for urself other than urself. So, risk it if u feel u should. Don’t if u do not want to. But just do not regret ur decision(i know its hard, but thru experiences can u become more matured. Accept it and move on).

Happy22 SG

How come my agony becomes a guessing game?

Crying or Very sad

I am not huiying. I feel like having a talk with him over the phone but I have no idea what excuse can i use to make that call.

foreverone87 SG

Well, ur source of agony is "a guessing game" from the context u put. Dat's is why we are looking at the source. Solving immediate problems is just temporary...

About that phone call, i'm not sure what to advice u on, maybe the others would have?

theoneguru SG

haha it's nv easy to confess la. wat me and my crush/love/bla bla did was he told me on MSN, and I said i also feel the same way. It may seem like the guy always has to confess, but if u don't tell him, u will nv be able to let go n stuff. n if u guys r close, even if he don't agree, u still can go on to be frenz. like me n my best fren. i used to think i like him, then one day he sent me this crushcalculator thing n i wrote i liked him, and they sent it to him! haha then he knew. but he told me he was gay haha then i obviousy lost interest. but until now we are still best of frenz...

my point is it's totally alright haha it's not as hard as u imagine it to be. just say can liao. u'll noe wat to do when the situation arises.

browniebaobao SG

haha so is he really gay?

Li Ka Shing SG

Hello.

May I offer an opinion?

I think u better don't tell him that u like him. Don't.
When you do that, you are fast-forwarding a process, skipping a process essential to your success in having a relationship with him.

I think it's better that you spend more time trying to make both of you closer and closer first......until such time when you don't feel uneasy or doubtful to say you like/ love him. Or from him to you.

I hope you understand what I mean.

For now it's better not to tell him. Otherwise, yeah, it will be like a gamble, and it will throw both of you off balance because the change is too sudden.

I think when u say u wanted to tell him u like him, you want to be more active. You want to turn the relationship into a romantic/ dating one. But better not say it out loud, better just by doing more approach first, like asking him out one-on-one. Call him, chit chat. Show attention. That kinda thing first. Shift gear from a platonic friend to a wooer. He will subtly notice. Then later see how. If he warm up, u can continue, and then reach a point where u can formalize the relationship. If he's cold, then maybe he really wants you as a friend or sister instead. By doing this I think it's much better than outright saying it out at the beginning.

de_middle SG

Understand how it's like to be in this.............mine didn't turn out good. So I never tried again Crying or Very sad

But i will still advise you to try, who knows everything will work out well for you. GOOD LUCK & ALL THE BEST in ur quest for LOVE Smile

rainee SG

Hmm, I used to have this same problem? I have liked this guy more than a year before I could bring myself to confess to him. Before that, it was pure nightmare. I kept second guessing his motives everytime he did something as innocent as to message me suddenly and asking me out, and everytime he did something for me, I would ask myself,"Does this mean he loves me?"

So I see my confession to him as a closure. I told myself that if the response is positive, then we will move on to become a couple. If not, then at least I know the answer and I will never ask myself the "what if" question again.

He told me that he only sees me as a friend, a very close one. Even though we can spend hours just talking to each other, but he says he feels comfortable with me, but he has no feelings towards me. So we agree to remain friends, and until this day, the friendship is still intact Smile

So, I think it would be good for you to confess to him how you feel. Because you will not have any regret even if it ended in rejection. And if you worry about risking the friendship, I believe that a strong friendship can withstand this kinda test.

What happened to me after the rejection? Yes, I was hurt but after a while, I can see that maybe Life has something else in store for me, and I moved on. If not because of the rejection, I would not have met my ai ai today Cool

Good luck Wink

theSquelch SG

whatever happened to subtle flirtation? sheesh.
flirt lah and get him to see you as a possible girlfriend and not just a small girl, instead of blurting out your feelings when you don't even know if he likes you.

FBI SG

don give a shit to him!! if a guy likes u he will take initiative, not u!!!

rainee SG

Some guys are just so thick-skulled that they don't get whatever signs that you send out Laughing

rainee SG

have to wait until when?

I guess if she wants to continue torturing herself with mind games, then she can continue to wait Laughing

If not, girls must realize that there are times when they can take their own initiative and pop the question too Wink

FBI SG

girls taking initiative at first isn’t a prob, but after that the rest of the job should let the guys do it. THat’s wat i think

rainee SG

Yea, but thing is she is asking about the initiative itself, whether she shud do it or not.

FBI SG

i think u should drop some hints and that’s enough. If he still doesn’t know or mayb u don like u then forget it. He will jus gonna regret if other guy get to know u.

rainee SG

erm, not a good suggestion cos like i have mentioned earlier, some guys just dun get it Laughing

theSquelch SG

if a guy doesn't get the obvious hints, the girl shouldn't fool herself.
he is not interested.

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