There are so many people, including those in this forum, who
think "snatching" other people's GF is not good. I understand this,
but Im wondering why there seem to be no or few people who think
otherwise.
I believe that when people are dating, there is a bond, there is a
commitment, but the bond is not official and not unbreakable. I do
believe when people get married, then the bond is supposed to be
official and unbreakable. Therefore I will not woo a married woman.
However, when the girl is still dating, she is still in the process
of searching and finding a life mate. She has not found her life
mate. She has not decided who her life mate is. She will make this
decision when she gets married and settle down. Therefore when the
girl is still dating, I have the view that every other guys still
have the right to woo her and she still have the right to change
her mind and leave her current boyfriend for a better suitor,
because she is still in the process of searching and finding a life
partner. She has not committed to her current boyfriend like a
commitment of a wife to a husband in a marriage.
So, with this view, that is why I believe there is nothing
ethically or morally wrong to woo a girl with a BF. I have thought
about it over and over again, and still dont think it is morally or
ethically wrong. The only thing I feel rather uncomfortable is the
hurt that the guy may feel when the girl leave him. However, I dont
understand why I should let this knowledge of his feeling of hurt,
stop me from wooing the girl. It's all fair and square. If the girl
thinks Im a better suitor than him, than so be it. If not, then Im
the one who lose, so be it too. It''s like a competition. For
example, in a race. I race with another guy. I win the race and
reach the finish line first. As the winner, I feel happy. As the
loser, the other guy feel sad. Should his feeling of being sad make
my win unethical or morally wrong? Should I run slowly to let him
win and let him feel happy instead? Is there anything wrong by
winning a race? If I'm the one who lose, does that mean the winner
owe me something?
Similarly, I think as long as the couple is not married yet, a
competition is fair and square. If I win, nothing is morally wrong
or unethical. If I lose, I also won't feel like I somehow get
cheated. It's a competition after all.
Some people say, what if the girl does the same thing and leave you
for another man? My view is, it's OK. As long as we are not
married, then other guys still have the right to woo her and she
has the right to choose the best suitor as she sees fit. After
marriage, then of course, both parties, should stop looking at
other people and should stop other people from wooing you. A
marriage is a commitment to settle down and be together forever,
unlike dating.
So there are several things in my mind: the difference between
marriage and dating, and fair competition.
