Well.. it's obvious that both of you are forgetting some
important element about BGR. That is the need of understanding each
other and leting each other to understand themselves.
Yours is a classic case, whereby, he has forgotten about your needs
and had turn selfish since he believes that you will give in to him
and he is the one in control of the relationship. It is true that
in any relationship, there can't be two person playing dominance.
One of the two has to totally submit or they can take turns but not
both at one time.
Regardless, in a situation like this, as in any negotiation issues.
Try turning the table against him.
1. Tell him, you are also tired of the BGR issues and all the crap
about reporting to him. You needs time to think as well. If he
wants to break up.. then be it. Afterall, all he cares is about
himself and has not shown any physical behaviour about loving you.
Anyone can abuse the 3 words and demand intimancy physically but
not able to care and understand how the other one feels.
2. If you claim that you love him so much.. well, I believe so but
not enough to be his submissive lover to allow him to walk all over
you. I am not saying that your love for him is not real.. but more
like, hmm.. not willing to sacrifice everything even if he doesn't
reciprocate and will one day betray your feeling. In short, you are
very normal.
3. The feeling of insecure is normal. If he can't share his
activities report, why share yours? If he demands to know, just
tell him off lah
"Last night? Haha.. I went out with some friends loh"
"What kind of friends? My friends lah."
"You want to know who? Hmm.. very difficult to discribe lah. Must
tell you everything that I do meh?"
"Are you implying that I'm unfaithful to this relationship? Hmm..
well, that mean you don't trust me lah? Why you feel so insecure? I
trusted you so much and seldom want to ask where and who you go out
with and you also never tell me what."
"What.. you suggesting a breakup so easily one. That means you are
seeing someone lah.."
"Whatever... I think I need to take a step back and think about the
entire relationship. If you are not ready for our relationsip, then
be it. You are just not ready."
4. Please note. Your first problem doesn't start with him. It
starts with you and how you are handling him. My ICQ number.
100-734-679 if you need someone to talk to.
