my bf

PerfectlyGreen SG

Well, try to be more understanding. Maybe he is a already very frustrated with things around him, just want to find somewhere to release his tension and let go of everything and just waste whatever energy he has on computer games.

Give him some allowance. Don't always think of ME ME ME. Try to let go on that. Always look at things at another angle. Nagging ain't going to help. It's really up to him whether he wants to spend time with you. You don't have to always stick onto your bf. Find other things to do with your life. No point thinking too much.

gerrykoh SG

Key your birthdate on his hp & put reminder to prompt him 1 week before yr birthday.
Tell him he must be more organised. If he cannot meet u for a date, he shd have the courtesy to give u a call.

Don't pamper him. Remind him to get a job cos u need to spend on yr wedding. Furthermore both of u need to save for hse. & kids.
It will be very tiring if only u are the sole breadwinner.

_Aaron_ SG

You know, nuchio and PerfectlyGreen are right.

The world does not revolve around you, and neither does a relationship. He forgot your bday, and you think that single act shows that he doesn't care about you?

You know what they say... it takes a thousand good deeds for people to build your reputation, but only one bad deed to ruin it all. I suggest looking at the 'thousand' good deeds he has done, instead of focusing on that one bad thing.

Regarding the ORD, slacking at home insteading of going to the job interviews you got for him.

I totally understand(but maybe because i'm a guy myself). We guys have a tendency to slack. Yea. After O levels, instead of getting a job right away(unless we're saving up for something), we'll just slack and play games at home. Or just hang out with our friends. Its the way we are. You have to accept it in your boyfriend.

Of course at one time or another, we'll 'wake up' and start focusing on our jobs, family, marriage. But until then, let us enjoy our youth a little more, before it gets lost forever...

SunRisE SG

Dear velvetgirl,

Be glad that he still have the heart to get you a present.. Though he forgets your bday is exactly.. At least the dates and month is not a great difference right?? If next time you don't wan him to forget your bday.. maybe when you are out shopping with him.. give him a hint lah..

Your bf must have a goal for himself.. right now.. he don't even know what he wants.. that's why he's been slacking.. and don't wan to look for a job.. give him some time.. or maybe you can ask him wat kind of job he would like to do.. or and plans for the future.. or any dreams or goals.. that he wants to attain?? maybe from there.. can talk to him about it.. if he really wan to acheive something.. he has to work for it.. Let him know the importance..

Cheers..

nOrmalbOi SG

good girls like these hard to find ahh..

p/s: u taken? Laughing

ak0 SG

do i noe u?
i noe a couple like that too.

blowfish SG

simply no excuse to forget wrongly…

Xcert SG

better U ask now then to let her find out later that U forgot.

MetalGear SG

Hi there,

I'll tell you that he'll only wake up when you start to stray n look at other men who are more passion driven, hardworking, have a drive to succeed financially and YET want to love a woman well... =)

Men love competition and only when you give him competition will he wake up and start to get nervous and want you back... I've seen and heard such stories all too many. Sadly most men are not naturally motivated to want to succeed high in life when they seem to have 'what's enough' for the moment. He is taking you for granted already and it's obvious.

Women are more attracted to men with a purpose, a goal, who are stable financially. Even if no money in the pockets presently, at least be driven and having a goal to succeed in a promising position. ie. no dreamers who want to be acting super stars.

Only idiots find jobs with lobangs. Sad to say... he's got much to learn. A workplace is a place to work n be serious. Not mingle with frens.

Only time and competition will wake him up sad to say...

All the best

Magnus SG

Be glad that 30th August is not some other girl's birthday.
Or it is? Twisted Evil

Devil1976 SG

Just your WILD GUESS...? Don't confuse this girl lah... Rolling Eyes

Magnus SG

Mr. Green

Magnus SG

NS life too tough? Maybe he just want to relax to compensate for the 2+yrs?
Maybe he needs more time to adjust?

Maybe, you can discuss with him on the future together? And how to go about reaching that target.
If you think it scares him, make short term targets like 2~3 years?
Joint-account savings? his dream job? further sudies? etc..

aH_v SG

Loose It and Relax a Little, Lady. : )

If you do understand, man are not wired to remember dates. They tried so hard to rely on their brains to the extend that, some become engineers. Why do you think there's PDA, digital organiser, mobile phone with contact details, e-mail softwares and ICQ contact to write down anniversaries dates? Some man even forgot about their own birthdate... and some of these man get married for this reason. Yes, their wife will remind them.

Anyhow, just embarass him about remembering it wrongly. After a few years maybe.. he may re-wire his memory to remember it as 3rd of Aug.

"Man are like Teabags.. you know..., you need to put them in boiling water in order to appreciate the full taste of it." If he is not able to apprecaite what you have done for him. They don't say 'there's a lady behind every successful man' for nothing. If he can't take your pressure.. well, I'll wish you good luck for taking care of a little brother if you still have the patience.

veLvEtgEr SG

yah lor last time when my bf havent ORD i also kept asking him what he wanna do after ORD cos i scared he will nua all the way. He also reply me same things "play computer game" or reply some crap things like "help government uphold law" cos he is police in NS. then i so worried. few yrs back he told me he wanna study after ns, now he say maybe not. i told him i will be willing to help him plan, but then again he got no initiative and not interested lor. whats the point? i keep planning for him no use SO SIAN.

last time i also think, he everyday play game at home means at least he's at home. but now... skali he's looking at porn ? or hooked up wif some girl in cyberspace? haha. i just cant believe how much a computer game can seem more important than his gf.

veLvEtgEr SG

im also very busy at work, so many decisions to make, so many things to sign. im like the pillar for my subordinates, if i fall means die liao. of course after work i wanna depend on someone too. im very stressed at work. and there he is, playing game at home everyday. who's more stressed? play games got more impt things than the things im dealing wif at work?

he celebrated my birthday wif me, cos it was sorta like a mega party, i invited all my frens thats why he's also there. he didnt ask me out for no reason

veLvEtgEr SG

i know him few yrs liao, few yrs ago i let him slack, everything was about him, it's all up to him. but then, he slack all the way till now? of course i must do something right. NS 2 yrs+, means slack 2yrs+ to pay back for what he has gone thru in ns? everything wasn't about me even till now, its about him. if he goes on well in life, i dun gain anything, he is the one who benefits. i dun need his money, i also might spend lesser time cos he will be busy. so in what ways do i benefit?

and about remembering things, if one really wants to remember, he/she would have at least noted down in hp or diary or whatever, or simply just tried to remember. i am also quite forgetful, but i note down things. all these come to one thing, he is lazy till he cant be bothered to remember

alien_04 SG

Haha, perhaps we should start reading Men from Mars and Women from Venus, men and women really think very differently on different issues....

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