quote]Originally posted by A Beautiful Mind:
Jus pondering over the miserable state of my social life
now..
The last time I had a regular group of friends, hang-out kakis was
in secondary sch. Over the yrs, as we grew up & move on, Ive
been feeling increasingly isolated & lonely.
The initial excitement of having a GF helps
but eventually, I felt
like a loser when I compare my life with hers. On any fri or sat,
shell have like queues of ppl (both guys & gals) waiting to
meet her. Even when shes with me physically, shell be busy
answering her calls.
By comparison, Ill be staring at my phone hoping for a call to
ease my embarrassment & wondering where has my life gone
wrong.
Ive always been amazed by the drastic differences in the way her
friends adored her & the way my friends treat me.
Today my phone hardly rings, except from my mum & work
purposes. The friends I managed to make in school now are the
classic hi-bye types. But at least I get to meet ppl when I am in
school or working part time. Im beginning to dread weekend cause
thats when I have no classes. I am also beginning to dread the
festive seasons, esp the year-end ones, cause thats where the
pressure of being alone & not having friends is the
greatest.
This period of isolation has given me time for reflections &
to work on other aspects of my life (e.g. family, work &
studies). But beyond these, I REALLY feel that there should be more
to life.
Ive not been to the movies or gone clubbing for ages
simply for
the lack of company. Small comforts that are co common &
natural for most ppl
seemed so elusive to me.
The only few friends I have now are those that almost never call
me
& from the way theyve been treating me, I rely feel so
discouraged about asking them out.
When you are treated like that by the ppl around you, its not
merely the feeling of having no company, being lonely. I start to
have this where have my life went wrong? Is there something
fundamentally flawed about me?
I've tried to work or sleep my way through the countless weekends
where i simply can't find human company. But i realised this
problem is really affecting my mood & self-esteem.
Feeling pathetic & terrible
[/quote]
Yo dude, chill out...
At one pt in time, I went thru almost the same stage as you.
When I was in pri and sec sch, I was so happy cos I have a lot of
frens around me. You know the sort where the differents heads think
alike. We would go out to orchard road on weekends jus to chill
out, go fishing, DIY camping, window shopping, looking at girls and
all that. Life was so carefree back then.. cos my frens stayed
nearby my block and so almost everyday we would hangout after
school to talk crap abt school and all that bull.
My life faced a drastic change when I stepped into a tertiary sch.
More of a culture shock really. There were so many 'fake' ppl in my
school and I kinda despised them. When I was in my first year, I
didn't have much frens. More of a loner. I was mighty depressed
that time and I tried to call back and hangout with those school
frens of mine. We met up once in a while and noticed that my frens
were no longer the same ppl as I knew them years ago. Everyone got
together and brag how cool their school were and how many gerls
they dated (ok ok, my tertiary school back then was so uncool. I
shall not say out what school that is). Boasting is the main thing
in our conversations.
And yes... I was so depressed. Very.
When I was in 2nd year, I joined music club. So from there, I tried
to open up myself and make more frens. At least better a bit. I
managed to play in school concerts. It was cool lah. But still I
was kinda shy towards gerls. Yeah I don't even have
gerl-frens.
Enuff of school life.. As usual, went to NS and spent 2 and a half
years there. I still don't have any girl-frens that time.. still
anti social...haha.. I get to know a few gerls and yeah.. from
there.. i did try and error thing.. and uh.. 'i failed'.. you
know.. those relationship things.
And now, I'm in the workforce. The first two years in the workforce
was kinda sad because of the transition from school/ns life to real
life. It's quite an eye opener to see that there are lot of
politics in a workplaces. Backstabbing, unwilling to share
knowledge by seniors and all that shit. So my life was more like
work, going home, work, going home and the cycle repeats itself.
You may ask where are school, NS frens.. they are settling down.
Those buaya frens of mine during school time.. yes.. they are
settling down.
I know how you feel dude..
But now, my life... can say that it's much more happening. I helped
my fren doing flea marts, hanging out wif a fren of mine who likes
to club (i also follow him clubbing), play in gigs (i got a band
lah) and from there, I try to socialise and do some 'networking'.
At this point in time, I've met lots ppl form walks of life... some
are cool to hangout with and some I really detest.
Well back to the point.. everyone do feel lonely at times. Me too.
We have to face it lah. It's a matter of how you deal with
it.
Maybe u can try befriend back those fellas which u feel u can
relate to. Hang out with them, go play pool or go clubbing with
them, whateverlah.. Try to stay away from those manic depressives..
this group of ppl can only make u feel worse.
It seems that u have low self-esteem problem. U should love
yourself more dude. Every morning, look at yourself in the mirror
and ask yourself what kind of person you are looking at. Have more
confidence. Smile always. Be more outgoing.. not to the extent of
being pretentious(well.. girls nowadays are like that! Outgoing,
outgoing.. but so fake! hehe..)
Just my 2 cents worth.. Feel good about yourself...
P/S: What kind of person yr gfren is? Wat's makes her so
famous?
