My Girlfriend is not a virgin how?

last SG · 2003-04-12T09:28:54+00:00

MOD [Topic closed as it no longer serves its purpose.]

yahoo.com SG

helo there.. me also used to be in ur kinda situation. she is my first gf ever and i was her >10 one. she did tell me the truth that she is not virgin etc but i accepted it telling her that i love her and not her body. ITS THE FACT that i loved her but as time passed i could not stop thinking that she aint a virgin. She slept with 2 of her ex bf when they were together. felt really hurt and posted in this forum.

Some kind people made me realise that my gf gave herself ONLY to the one she loved at that time and not to other people. if give to other ppl then thats called a bitch. anyway i have gotten over it for quite some time. beginning to accept the fact that its quite diff to find a virgin nowadays(not impossible). But even if there was a virgin out there who likes me or wat, i will definitely still be with my non-virgin gf and hope to marry her one day.

People make mistakes and everyone deserves a second chance. i am sure that she will treat u well even if she is not a virgin. she loves u thats why she told u the truth. i think that its not easy for GALS to tell a guy that they are not virgin?( i dunno... i m guy).

Please talk to ur gal about this.. about how u feel. i m sure that she will be more sensitive about this issue and will know how to handle it. TRUST ME FREN. i have been there and done that. in fact i am extremely happy being with her now. i know she loves me a lot and i too love her alot... hope u will love ur gf even after finding out the truth. remember everyone deserves a 2nd chance. wat more is she didnt anyhow go and sleep around. Neutral Neutral Neutral

Transmission SG

since u say that virgin is very important ..

go find your target outside some pri sch...
then wait ...

when the time has come ....

Twisted Evil

foga SG

the truth always hurt doesn't it.
i understand your feelings brudder.
i used to wish my gf was a V when i met her.then i sort of straighten out my tots.

why do we guys alwaays think of V in a gal as a bottle of chilli sauce in a supermarket. when someelse before you open it liao then you dun buy... think this way of course it'll hurt.

let go and let live.

kohanson SG

yah, it's normal to feel that way.. but you have to get over it since you want to marry her.

jos79 SG

aiya, y mind so much. dat means she's a easy target. hv u tried her b4? if no, u r a loser Mr. Green

BufPuf SG

very funni leh..if ger not V anymore..den u xian qi her...

y cannot the ger xian qi u r still a virgin....or other cases..y the ger cannot xian qi the guy is not virgin.. Evil or Very Mad

actually..try looking on the other side..doing it with her exs..is better than she going out for flings or ONS...she must love her ex so much to willing to do it with him..but along the way..maybe of other factors..they broke up..and this is not foreseen by her during that time when she has sex with her ex mah...

u cannot blame her just becoz she is not a virgin anymore..and LIVE WITH IT..coz you can't change the fact anymore...

foga SG

ya agree.
better she did it wif her ex than those flings.

Iceangel SG

Understand understand. But the point is when you first fall in love with the gurl, is "whether she is a virgin or not" the first thing in your mind? Then shouldn't that be the first thing u try to find out before you go into a relationship wif her?

I am a gurl and at times I find hard to have to accept bf not virgin and all, but of course many will say how many guys can remain one....similarly look @ the society now, think some gurls now are even more "on" than guys! I try never to imagine or think too much about it...e thing is u seemed to have a very active imagination (same here) and hence can lead to alot of upsets esp. when the pix in yer head is negative.

But e rest is right, u could hv been pressurised or really love the guy b4 rite...if she told u she had many ONS or flings then ya, if its during a course of relationship, ya, as a gurl I will encourage u to do something too....but the point is when u made e decision to love her, it was for what u know best. So, discipline yerself not to imagine not to let it affect u, I dun think she'll feel veri good esp. she was being honest wif u. ANd never, say awful things during fights to hurt her either, u'll only push her away....all e best

AzRaeL SG

it's not that you're trying to be selfish
you just are

AzRaeL SG

It is an infantile superstition of the human spirit that virginity would be thought a virtue and not the barrier that separates ignorance from knowledge.

Voltaire

[email protected] SG

Originally posted by Iceangel:
[b]

Understand understand. But the point is when you first fall in love with the gurl, is "whether she is a virgin or not" the first thing in your mind? Then shouldn't that be the first thing u try to find out before you go into a relationship wif her?

I am a gurl and at times I find hard to have to accept bf not virgin and all, but of course many will say how many guys can remain one....similarly look @ the society now, think some gurls now are even more "on" than guys! I try never to imagine or think too much about it...e thing is u seemed to have a very active imagination (same here) and hence can lead to alot of upsets esp. when the pix in yer head is negative.

i think you got wat i ment.. its the pix in ur head that is very disturbing?

But e rest is right, u could hv been pressurised or really love the guy b4 rite...if she told u she had many ONS or flings then ya, if its during a course of relationship, ya, as a gurl I will encourage u to do something too....but the point is when u made e decision to love her, it was for what u know best. So, discipline yerself not to imagine not to let it affect u, I dun think she'll feel veri good esp. she was being honest wif u. ANd never, say awful things during fights to hurt her either, u'll only push her away....all e best[/b]

ice i think u got wat i ment .. its the kind of image of her appearing in ur head that disturbs...i've tried talking to her yesterdae night.. butnot very fruitful.. i got very upset however no strong feelings to leave her.. the pain is very excruciating.. day n nite for the past many months im in pain.. im trying hard to break this thought through.. but it always get stuck some where.. im like in a box and everywhere i see i a dead end.. Ice how did u manage to do it?
to be crude the feeling i always get is the woman i love; my wife to be is being f*** by somebody else.. argh!!! im goin mad!!! Exclamation

sadsadguy SG

Truth is, I wun mind at all, and so shouldn’t you. If you mind, you aren’t in love with her.

the Bear SG

love is love, damn the consequences....

if you cannot accept her past, how can she trust you with her future?

if she loves you enough to trust you with her past and her future, do the right thing..

what this right thing is, is up to yourself and your own soul-searching to figure out.

kimmorger SG

wah liew now wat yr liao?stil virgin dis virgin dat?kaoz! Laughing

AzRaeL SG

actually you went mad a while ago.
as long as she doesn't call out the other guys' (note plural) names while fucking you good enough.

Yunhaier SG

In my opinon you have the right to ask for a virgin gf ONLY IF YOU ARE A VIRGIN YOURSELF.

In our case there, I suppose you are, which brings you to the next level of question. Rolling Eyes

If your gf knows that by telling you this, it would make you love her less - you think she will tell you? There is ONE very IMPORTANT fact about relationship and I would like to stress on to everyone here: NOBODY - absolutely NOBODY can demand your partner to tell you about his/her past relationship unless he/she tells you willingly on her part. Because it is her past - you have absolutely NOTHING to do with it. You ain't involved and you ain't related.

To tell you is your privilage, not your rights. Rolling Eyes

Why the hell would she tell you? Simple: Because she trust you and wants to share her past with you.

If you are so affected by it: you could break her, because virginity is something that cannot be undone. But let me tell you: What if you next gf happens to be a non-virgin again? You can't be asking people whether they are virgin or not during courtship, can you?' Rolling Eyes

You have the right to seek for a virgin girlfriend is you are a virgin yourself. If virginity is the only thing you seek - dump her. If Love was in the picture, Love would have tell you that past is over, what matters is the future and how well you treat her. If you going to love her less, treat her bad, etc - you are no different from those jerks that fool her to bed. Rolling Eyes

P.S: If Love tells you that you should treasure her more, would you?

Cheers

De|usi0n SG

wat r u? MCP? get a life/

puppylove SG

abt half a yr ago she told me abt this.. then i was quite affected.. cos she was my first girl friend..[/b]

so long already and u still cant accept it? Mad and the fact that she ACTUALLY told you the truth and you still can ask us wat if ur gf is not a virgin? oh my god! are you blind? can't u see the fact that she trusts you? u having her as a first doesn mean that u are one of those loyal kind that will not fall in/out of love easily, and she having alot of bf, doesn mean that she is those that jump from one bf to another!! it's not a thing to compare.. u cant judge her like that.. i can tell u that she's regretting like crazy for tellin u the truth, cos u are so over reactin, would u like to have found the truth out urself? i can tell u she is in pain too, u're not the only one, dun keep thinkin bout urself, think about her.. how insensitive can someone get??

although it will affect u but u have to LIVE WITH IT. if u cant, u can either go kill urself or ask every next girl tat might be ur gf whether they're a virgin or not Rolling Eyes and if virginity means so much to you, you can go be a monk, stop wasting ur time. you'll nv find true love this way. and also, how long have u been with her? u mean u love her sooo much that u are sure that she'll be ur future wife, but yet u cant accept her past? haha, i think that's so immature, thinkin that she'll be ur future wife.. Laughing cos' i can see that the love[ or not ] that's there, is not deep enough yet, and the way u described wat u think.. shows how shallow u are.

SunRisE SG

Originally posted by Yunhaier:

In my opinon you have the right to ask for a virgin gf ONLY IF YOU ARE A VIRGIN YOURSELF.

In our case there, I suppose you are, which brings you to the next level of question.

If your gf knows that by telling you this, it would make you love her less - you think she will tell you? There is ONE very IMPORTANT fact about relationship and I would like to stress on to everyone here: NOBODY - absolutely NOBODY can demand your partner to tell you about his/her past relationship unless he/she tells you willingly on her part. Because it is her past - you have absolutely NOTHING to do with it. You ain't involved and you ain't related.

To tell you is your [b]privilage, not your rights. Rolling Eyes

Why the hell would she tell you? Simple: Because she trust you and wants to share her past with you.

If you are so affected by it: you could break her, because virginity is something that cannot be undone. But let me tell you: What if you next gf happens to be a non-virgin again? You can't be asking people whether they are virgin or not during courtship, can you?' Rolling Eyes

You have the right to seek for a virgin girlfriend is you are a virgin yourself. If virginity is the only thing you seek - dump her. If Love was in the picture, Love would have tell you that past is over, what matters is the future and how well you treat her. If you going to love her less, treat her bad, etc - you are no different from those jerks that fool her to bed. Rolling Eyes

P.S: If Love tells you that you should treasure her more, would you?

Cheers[/b]

Totally agree!!!! Too tired and sick to post.. Mind not working well too.. THink about it.. If virginity is really that important to you... then dun be in this relation... Neutral

Ask yourself this one question: How many ladies in the world are virgin?? Well i guess (from my view) Most of the women are not virgin... So if you happen to meet all your gf and have lost their virginity.. Are you goin to dump them all one by one.. and live your life as a bachelor.. Until one day you finally found one who is a virgin.. but not someone you love.. Rolling Eyes

You can overcome this fear you had in you! Face it or forever you live with it.. Is neither good or bad... But when you know you found someone who you really love and really wan to spend your life with.. but found out she isn't a virgin.. And you are jus gonna give up your happiness jus like tat?? and let it pass thru your life... I hope you won't regret if it really do happen!! Rolling Eyes

Well.. since she already told you about it.. Its up to you to decide whether you can take it or give up.. If you really love.. you wont mind all her past.. but to live with her.. together with you.. and go towards your future and life ahead... Wink

Take careZzz and Cheers!! Wink

Angel^_^ SG

well..next time..prepare a “virgin-detecter”..so..u’ll noe who is virgin and who’s not..before u fallen into the river of love..be fair to the girl..and be fair to u..why wanna to find faults in tis relationship after u guys hv been together for some time?

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