What are the reasons for me to believe in God?
Well, it depends on which God. Although I excepted Christ during
my teens, I grew up with in a family where my father is a Tang Ki,
a Chinese Medium. He had bloodless scars when he used parangs to
slash his own belly. He also kept Kun Man Thong (Those Thai statues
of little children believed to be spirits of children).
I stopped attending church after my O'levels I also became a
professed Thai Buddhist where I consulted a Bomoh & I set up an
altar at my own home, I did'nt even know what I was worshipping. I
worshipped anything which promises me wealth. It is a Phra Na Prok
statue, a Buddha sheltered by a Giant Cobra but for mine, the
statue sitting there was Khum Paeng, a general in Thailand during
the medievel days, the one who believed to be the Father of all the
Kun Man Thong. In the Thai mythology, he sweared before the devils
from Hell to make him the most powerful warrior on earth, he killed
his wife & roasted his unborn foetus over fire, his foetus
spirit made him a powerful warrior, but his story also ended up in
a tragedy.
The Phra Na Prok statue was one of the kind, with seven monkey
heads on the Cobra's crown, with Khum Paeng sitting on it.In the
Cobra's coiled body there were those pearl like bone
relics(believed to be the monk's unburnt ashes) sealed by a Tan
Gah. Those copper plates with the symbolic signs.
I also kept a Phra Som Deq pendant where I will always put on
faithfully. I also chanted faithfully on every Thurs morning. I
will also visit Thai Temples to worship Phra Pong, the four face
Buddha & often get the monks to bless me.
But a twist of fate happened to me. Although my dad did strike
4D oftenly, my parents were divorced. Both my parent were down with
schizophrenia. My Dad was also down with stroke & every single
organ was failing him. He almost lost his life. For me, I lost my
job, lost my house, lost my car & what I only have is my wife
& kid. I looked for a shelter to for my Dad to live in. At
last, it was a Pastor who lended the 1st helping hand. That was my
turning point. I returned to Christ. Now my Dad is resting in a
Methodist nursing home.
Through this twist of fate, I am now attending church. Although
life is not smooth & I faced some of my toughest times in my
life even when I'm a Christian. Me & my wife is on the brink of
bankruptcy. But deep inside I know that this is the God that I want
to worship. The God of Abraham, Jacob & Moses. The same God
which parted the Red Sea & brought His people out of Eygpt. The
strength which the Lord gave me to overcome the few of my most
toughest times made me knew that it was'nt me. I was broke but not
broken. It was my God who strengthened me. I grew in character
& learnt how to enjoy my family life although we are not
financially well off, as well as the wisdom to handle money which
do not seem to be much. I was given the Grace to repent for my
wrong doings.
Although I am not saint, but I am looking forward to changing
myself everyday, from the inside out. I regained my fitness, I have
a stable job despite the economical madness & I am expecting a
pay rise next month. No one forced me to accept Jesus as my Lord
& Saviour. I chose Him because I believe in His goodness, His
mercy especially His acceptance of who I am.
