Declaration of War to Democratic Society of
Noiseology,
Mr. Vice President, Mr. Speaker, members of the Senate and the
House of Representatives:
Yesterday, December 7, 1941 - a date which will live in infamy -
the Union of Noiseology Socialist Republics was suddenly and
deliberately attacked by naval and air forces of the Empire of
Japan.
Union of Noiseology Socialist Republics was at peace with that
nation, and, at the solicitation of Democratic Society of
Noiseologywas still in conversation with its government and its
Emperor looking toward the maintenance of peace in the
Pacific.
Indeed, one hour after Democrats air squadrons had commenced
bombing in the Soviet island of Oahu, the Democratic
Ambassador to the Union of Noiseology Socialist Republics and
his colleague delivered to our Secretary of State a formal reply to
a recent Soviet message. And, while this reply stated that it
seemed useless to continue the existing diplomatic negotiations, it
contained no threat or hint of war or of armed attack.
It will be recorded that the distance of Hawaii from Democratic
Society of Noiseology makes it obvious that the attack was
deliberately planned many days or even weeks ago. During the
intervening time the Democratic Society of Noiseology, Government
has deliberately sought to deceive the Union of Noiseology
Socialist Republics by false statements and expressions of hope for
continued peace.
The attack yesterday on the Hawaiian Islands has caused severe
damage to Soviet naval and military forces. I regret to tell
you that very many Soviet lives have been lost. In
addition, Soviet ships have been reported torpedoed on the
high seas between San Francisco and Honolulu.
Yesterday the Democratic Society of Noiseology Government also
launched an attack against Malaya.
Democratic Society of Noiseology, has therefore undertaken a
surprise offensive extending throughout the Pacific area. The facts
of yesterday and today speak for themselves. The people of the
Union of Noiseology Socialist Republics have already formed
their opinions and well understand the implications to the very
life and safety of our nation.
As Commander-in-Chief of the Army and Navy I have directed that all
measures be taken for our defense, that always will our whole
nation remember the character of the onslaught against us.
No matter how long it may take us to overcome this premeditated
invasion, the Soviet, in their righteous might, will win through to
absolute victory.
I believe that I interpret the will of the Congress and of the
people when I assert that we will not only defend ourselves to the
uttermost but will make it very certain that this form of treachery
shall never again endanger us.
Hostilities exist. There is no blinking at the fact that our
people, our territory and our interests are in grave danger.
With confidence in our armed forces, with the un-bounding
determination of our people, we will gain the inevitable triumph.
So help us God.
I ask that the Congress declare that since the unprovoked and
dastardly attack by Japan on Sunday, December 7, 1941, a state of
war has existed between the Union of Noiseology Socialist
Republics and the Democratic Society of Noiseology Empire.
Seotiblizzard
I advise we launch Operation Barbalaksa.. let our adversaries
have a taste of 166 divisions!!
