im just saying that ang mohs wont get the joke. haha
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Science..and Seduction.. Oddfellows or Bedfellows?
A More Scientific Approach to Flirting!
If flirting is instinctive, why do we need this Guide?
Like every other human activity, flirting is governed by a
complex set of unwritten laws of etiquette. These rules dictate
where, when, with whom and in what manner we flirt. We generally
obey these unofficial laws instinctively, without being conscious
of doing so.
Where to flirt?
Parties
Flirting is most socially acceptable at parties, celebrations
and social occasions/functions. At some such events (e.g.
Christmas/New Year parties) a degree of flirtatious behaviour is
not only socially sanctioned, but almost expected.
This is because most parties, celebrations, carnivals and
festivals are governed by a special code of behaviour which
anthropologists call ‘cultural remission’ – a temporary, structured
relaxation of normal social controls and restrictions.
This might just sound like a fancy way of saying ‘letting your
hair down’, but it isn’t. ‘Cultural remission’ does not mean
abandoning all your inhibitions, letting rip and behaving exactly
as you please. There are rules of behaviour at even the wildest
carnival – although they may involve a complete reversal of normal,
everyday social etiquette. Flirtatious behaviour which is normally
frowned upon may be actively required, and prissy refusal to
participate may incur disapproval.
Drinking Places
Flirting is also socially acceptable in some public settings,
usually where alcohol is served – such as bars, pubs, night-clubs,
discos, wine bars, restaurants, etc. One survey showed that 27% of
British couples first met their current partner in a pub, and
alcohol was voted the most effective aid to flirting by respondents
in the Martini Flirting Survey.
Flirting in drinking-places is, however, subject to more
conditions and restrictions than at parties. In pubs, for example,
the area around the bar counter is universally understood to be the
‘public zone’, where initiating conversation with a stranger is
acceptable, whereas sitting at a table usually indicates a greater
desire for privacy. Tables furthest from the bar counter are the
most ‘private’ zones.
Learning-places
Schools, colleges, universities and other educational
establishments are hot-beds of flirting. This is largely because
they are full of young single people making their first attempts at
mate selection.
Learning-places are also particularly conducive to flirting
because the shared lifestyle and concerns of students, and the
informal atmosphere, make it easy for them to initiate conversation
with each other. Simply by being students, flirting partners
automatically have a great deal in common, and do not need to
struggle to find topics of mutual interest.
Flirting is officially somewhat more restricted in
learning-places than in drinking-places, as education is supposed
to take priority over purely social concerns, but in many cases the
difference is not very noticeable. Taking a course or evening class
may in fact provide more opportunities for relaxed, enjoyable
flirting than frequenting bars and night-clubs.
Workplace
At work, flirting is usually acceptable only in certain areas,
with certain people and at specific times or occasions. There are
no universal laws: each workplace or working environment has its
own unwritten etiquette governing flirtatious behaviour.
In some companies, the coffee machine or cafeteria may be the
unofficial ‘designated flirting zones’, other companies may frown
on any flirting during office hours, or between managers and staff,
while some may have a long-standing tradition of jokingly
flirtatious morning greetings.
Careful observation of colleagues is the best way to discover
the unspoken flirting etiquette of your own workplace – but make
sure that you are guided by the behaviour of the most highly
regarded individuals in the company, not the office ‘clown’,
‘groper’ or ‘bimbo’.
Participant sports/hobbies
Almost any participant sport or hobby can involve flirting. The
level of flirtatious behaviour, however, often tends to be
inversely related to the standards achieved by participants and
their enthusiasm for the activity.
You will generally find a lot of flirting among incompetent
tennis players, unfit swimmers, cack-handed potters, etc., but
somewhat less among more proficient, serious, competitive
participants in the same activities. There are of course exceptions
to this rule, but before joining a team or club, it is worth trying
to find out if the members have burning ambitions to play in the
national championships or win prestigious awards for their
handiwork. If you are mainly looking for flirting opportunities,
avoid these high-flying groups, and seek out clubs full of happy,
sociable under-achievers.
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