testin my patience... still coping..

ilovethesun SG

1st weekend : Friend one comes to stay

2nd weekend: friend 2 comes to stay

this month: Boyfriend comes to stay.. and still staying..

next month: another 2 friends comin to stay for the weekend..

she asked me " they can stay right?"
i say " anithing"

she : can right?
i : anithing

she seldom talks to me. this is one of the times she does.

we are colleagues that happen to share the same apartment our company rented for us. 2 rooms, 1 kitchen, 1 toilet, 1 small living room. we jus got to know each other.

its nice meeting new pple.. i relai liked that.. but no when she plans everything and dun let me know/join..

I feel like an intruder. no privacy at all..

maybe it dun sound bad that her bf is stayin tog. bt our apartment is so small, dinner time all 3 squeese inside prepare dinner, but 2 sets of dinner.

breakfast, he will took up the whole kitchen. i onli can make cornflakes n milk.

if everyone takes care of each other , maybe livin tog is nt difficult.
but I am like invisible.

when we take the bus to work in the morning, i took a double seat , and she will jus sit somewhere else.
if she chooses the seat 1st, she will choose a single seat.

i duno how long i can live with her. its so tiring. sad

mystee SG

from this... i think she dun like u leh.. can u ask ur company to share another apartment with another person..

& oso.. i dun think she is allowed to bring other ppl in to stay lor.. very inconsiderate person..

gigabyte14 SG

tell her to fu ck off.

ilovethesun SG

yup i think so too.. but when she ask me for favours, she wil be realli nice..
" XXX, my bf comin, he can stay with us for the time being? oh pls... "
den i cant bear to say no, den i say .. yup sure..

when i make pasta for dinner, i wil ask if she wants,, den i make double.
but when she / bf makes meal.. they jus make for themselves.

cant. onli the 2 of us here for work.

i also think she is inconsiderate. but i cant tell anyone..
freak.. damn pissed.. i nvr met anione like her before.

so mani frens came to stay.. and all are guys.. i find it quite ridiculous..

lageihsif SG

tell the bf Laughing

mystee SG

if i were u.. i cant stand it one lor.. since she is so bad.. i dont c any point for u to be nice to her.. complain to ur company if u cant stand it..

mystee SG

Laughing another way is.. seduce all the guys who she bring in.. haha.. then she wont dare to bring any more guys liao...

honeymouse SG

It's really very inconsiderate of your colleague. When she asked you about her friends coming to stay, you should use the opportunity to say no. You shouldn't let her continue to step over your boundary otherwise very soon you might end up sleeping on the street.

I think the boyfriend is rather selfish too. Since he's not in a hurry to go to work or something, he should let you use the kitchen/bathroom first so that you can get ready to go to work.

I don't think you should just keep quiet and feel miserable. Talk to her about it!!!

ilovethesun SG

had a teleconversation with our bosses this morning. they asked hw r we coping.. any issues or problems..

so wanna scream out " YES.. PLS bring me back home.. idun wann be here with her anymore.. "

but the words came out was " yes.. we r fine.. enjoyin ourselves"

Sad

mystee SG

or maybe another way is.. tell u r boss that u prefer to stay alone.. not comfortable staying with another person.. cos living lifestyle differ..

gigabyte14 SG

welll

it will all come out when u have a private conversation with the boss.

no use always taking all the damage rite?

FireIce SG

i think u are not allowed to bring other ppl to stay in the apt rite?
it's paid by the company
u can go report her to the company

or u can try to live with it and stop being nice to her

ilovethesun SG

I wish to stay alone too... but its bad because they are payin for our accomodation.. so if 2 separate will be quite an additional cost.

at 1st they asked if we wanted to stay with another british family, but we choose to stay on our own.

shit.. shld have chosen the former.

lageihsif SG

ask her go her frens/bf hse lo

or u ask ur frens come over too

mystee SG

u will be working here for good.. or temporary?

if u will be here for good.. i will suggest u to tok to your company abt it... but if u just here for a short period & u dun want to make things bad.. then try & tolerate and live with it.. but dun let her climb up ur head & sh1t there.. stop treating her well.. cos... she dont deserve it! Mad

ilovethesun SG

yes girl, u;re right.. i shld have but i din know hw to reject nicely.
I was quite pissed off. i dun wan my words to hurt or wad.. i can be quite crude . i din look at her.. jus lookin at my monitor and i was at a loss for words. wth.. i diin wan to sound petty.. like.. SORRY>> ITS OUR HOME< SO no friends allowed anymore.

The bf woke up to make breakfast for her. she was zzz still.
he camehere to find a job too.. and if he does, he will quit his sg job n stay here for 1 yr..

Ito_^ SG

act mean.

next time say no, with valid reasons.

obviously she is looking down on you, takes advantage of you and deem you unworthy in her social circle.

complain to the company, if u wan.

i think its easier if u live alone, than with someone like that.

ilovethesun SG

Actually its perfectly ok if frens comes to visit . stay while here, IF me n her gets along well and we are on good terms.

but things gets abit tough when i feel that she is selfish n inconsiderate.. i dun wanna give her friends/ bf the privilege of free accomodation .

you get wad i feel?

yea.. but we jus got here barely 1 mth, and im still tryin to cope with the change and there she is.. alradi announced and invited her frends before hand. hhaha.. haiz..

lageihsif SG

pay rent! Evil or Very Mad

honeymouse SG

My friend, please learn to stand up for yourself. I think she can see your weakness (doesn't dare to say no) and continue to take advantage of you.

I understand you want to be nice, however sometimes you need to learn to protect your own boundary - to learn when to say yes and when to say no. If you don't think you can speak to her directly, write her a note.

At the same time, talk to your company about the situation and try to find out if the company can find you another place to stay. Since the company sent you there to work, it's an obligation for your company to meet your needs regardless the cost.

If you don't know what to write in the note, I am happy to help you to write it and I will try to put it in the best possible ways.

Be strong my friend. Wink