Schmidt Sting Pain Index or The Justin O. Schmidt Pain Index was
created by Justin O. Schmidt, an entomologist. Having been stung by
almost everything, Schmidt created (on his own time) an index to
compare the overall pain of insect stings on a four-point
scale.
1.0 Sweat bee: Light, ephemeral, almost fruity. A tiny spark has
singed a single hair on your arm.
1.2 Fire ant: Sharp, sudden, mildly alarming. Like walking across a
shag carpet & reaching for the light switch.
1.8 Bullhorn acacia ant: A rare, piercing, elevated sort of pain.
Someone has fired a staple into your cheek.
2.0 Bald-faced hornet: Rich, hearty, slightly crunchy. Similar to
getting your hand mashed in a revolving door.
2.0 Yellowjacket: Hot and smoky, almost irreverent. Imagine WC
Fields extinguishing a cigar on your tongue.
3.0 Red harvester ant: Bold and unrelenting. Somebody is using a
drill to excavate your ingrown toenail.
3.0 Paper wasp: Caustic & burning. Distinctly bitter
aftertaste. Like spilling a beaker of Hydrochloric acid on a paper
cut.
4.0 Pepsis wasp: Blinding, fierce, shockingly electric. A running
hair drier has been dropped into your bubble bath (if you get stung
by one you might as well lie down and scream).
4.0+ Bullet ant: Pure, intense, brilliant pain. Like walking over
flaming charcoal with a 3-inch nail in your heel.
