well i try before when the whole world came crush down on me 2
years ago
i went into depression due to family, love and work life,
girlfriend leave me and my boss abuse me in work, my mum pass away.
all 3 thing happen together and it really hit me hard. i totally
unable take all 3 stress together...........
on that night i cant take it anymore and drive the car to bishan
temple
3am midnite i put a tube through the exhast pipe and start the
process to meet my mum.
strange thing is i keep waking up after fall asleep and keep
waking up. 1/2 way through i feel that i still awake and decided to
put the tube into my mouth for faster effect. and i fall asleep
again.
somehow i was rescue and only wake up in caying in the hospital
and was under charge by the police. stay 1 week in hospital due to
carbon poison. result was its damage/weaken my strength
/body, but i regain them 2 years back now.
SOS never helped me in any way. i try to email and only manage
to get a reply by them 1 DAY later. at that point i does not
wish to speak to them. i only willing to massage them. but all they
tell me is they dont have this system to msg, you wan help. you
call. msg service dont have loh. unelss you are willing to talk.
then forget about SOS.
2 years back from now. i living better, happier with life.
eventhough i still out of relationship, but i have friends and
family, even though my sister and bro look down on me because i
never complete "O" level and they are grad. and life still hard for
me as been low edu in this singapore, you cant get a good job with
higher income. im still happy because i learn to be contant ( dont
know how to spell. paisei).
now i trying to accept christian( i been to church a few times )
but im a very very firm beliver in Buddhish that Y its getting
confuse for me right now. but i think i will get through it at
later part. its doesnt matter whether its chris or budd for me as
wat important to me is that i believe the path is there for me.
ppl say that its my mum or my god that save me that day,because
carbon posion should have killed me that day because im drove to
the temple where her spirit is resting (光明山）i dont know .... but
all i know is i'm more happy right now compare to 2 years ago.
by the way my sucide case was discharged last year.
find yr god to talk to if you really feel depress.
