gf problem

last SG · 2010-03-30T14:21:10+00:00

Ya...TO Typically: read my post then you decide ba. I am really going through alot of pain. Yet at the same time can feel her love and care at the same time....

Saltiga SG

sometime a man gonna do what a man gonna do, just let her be, giving in too much to her will make her worst, and the thing is that if she really love you, you probably dun have to do anything other then showing her you true feelings for her and caring for her

goofyzell SG

I sent her a "hugs" sms, just "hugs" 4 letters only and 2 hours later, she replied saying she going to take a short nap. In her reply, she called me dear.

In the evening, her mum asked me over for dinner tml over the phone . My gf was beside her and heard the conversation. She didnt tell me not to go over when the phone was passed back to her.

Just ended the call with her(b4 sleep call) and she said i can go to her house anytime tml afternoon.

: )

goofyzell SG

nvm... she is still v cold to me...

TTFU SG

Whats with the blowing hot and cold, does her mum know that you two are in this cool down period ? Aiya want cool down jiu few days dont contact, like that half half brings you to no-where.

TYING SG

goofyzell,

I'm stumped for words already. lol. Don't know how to help. The only thing i can think of now is take the initiative and tell her that you cannot take this kind of behavior anymore. Awhile with her being so passionate, awhile distancing herself from you by showing attitude. Ask her for an answer now, and tell her that you will respect her decision. You set the deadline, not her! Stop giving her the authority to decide your fate!

If she say she wants to continue, do remember to lay down the rules. No more blowing hot and cold. It is not very healthy for a relationship. And that this sort of attitude would only make the both of you miserable. If she say no, she wants to quit. Exit her life gracefully.

Wish you all the best. =)

goofyzell SG

Whats with the blowing hot and cold, does her mum know that you two are in this cool down period ? Aiya want cool down jiu few days dont contact, like that half half brings you to no-where.

yes her mum knows. she was there when my gf blew her top. Her mum asked me to go home 1st while she try to talk to my gf.

She is the 1st one to call n sms leh....

goofyzell SG

goofyzell,

Wish you all the best. =)

Went to her house in the afternoon since her mum invited me over for dinner. Bought her lunch on the way. She showed me black, dull face all the way.

I got pissed off 2 hours later by her attitude and by all the negative things she said so I changed clothes to go home. As I walked to the door, she kept pulling me back, at the same time she kept saying sorry. I stopped at the main door and she said she prefers to be alone. I said, stop lying to yourself. If you really like to be alone, you wont have a bf at all.

After a few more exchange she broke down and cried. Calmed her down, asked her not to put too much stress on herself and persuaded her to take a nap as she said she is very tired. I can sense that she is very emotionally and physically tired.

She knocked out instantly when she is in bed. Few hours later, she woke up and a while later she is ok... Just like b4 the quarrel, maybe happier...

Hope it last... We will see how along the way...

TTFU SG

I will still stand by what i said, maybe contact through phone and sms, but try not to meet in real life and let her have some time to think about things

TYING SG

Went to her house in the afternoon since her mum invited me over for dinner. Bought her lunch on the way. She showed me black, dull face all the way.

She knocked out instantly when she is in bed. Few hours later, she woke up and a while later she is ok... Just like b4 the quarrel, maybe happier...

Hope it last... We will see how along the way...

If your girl is an emotionally uptight person, then i guess no matter how much calming down sessions or what would work ba. Maybe you make up your mind whether you want to be with her or not? Accept her for her emotional flaws, and deal with it one by one. Don't know if im saying the right thing or not also. =X

goofyzell SG

I will still stand by what i said, maybe contact through phone and sms, but try not to meet in real life and let her have some time to think about things

think she is trying to avoid me in a way at the moment. seems abit cold at times.

she has also requested that she would like to have this coming sat to herself, just to rot at home, rest, listen to music. I told her I am ok with this...

She is ok with meeting up on Sunday.

goofyzell SG

Well, I am not very sure about this. When I first knew her as a friend, she is very happy, outgoing, not like now quite emo and insecure. After the last relationship ended then she became like this.

Been 7 months now. Though she is alot better, deep down inside she seems very hurt, scar is very deep. She knows how much I love her, pamper her, care for her. Yet it seems at times she says very negative and hurtful stuff which she doesnt seem to realise.

Only when I am leaving her then her actions speak for her heart, which is not to let me go...

TTFU SG

Ya i believe that is what she needs. You leaving her. Until then she will then realise how important you are. And not take you for granted

evolutiondiva SG

Something similar to what is happening to my brother. He's currently 25 this yr and his gf is the same age as him.

My brother was very nice to her. She feels hurt and sad about the previous relationship she had because her ex 2 timed her . BUT my brother have never been in a single relationship before. So this current gf , is the 1st. When my brother is free he will always make a trip down to her office to eat lunch with her. And will fetch her home every day without fail. I strongly believed that she is taking my brother for granted. I don't know why she has to meet my brother everyday. Its like she will die if she didn't meet my brother for only a day. So , its very normal for guys to bring gf out along for friend's birthday party and outing right ? The problems started.

During one of his friend's birthday party , 1 of the girl whom he knew , said hello to her. Just a mere greeting and she reprimanded my brother by saying he is flirting with her. Ever since that day , he's not allowed to go any friend's birthday party.

Friend's outing.. There's a day whereby my brother meet his best friend out for dinner. For a few hours.. Few days later , his best friend wanna meet him for a movie. And his gf disapprove of him meeting his best friend saying that the dinner meeting is enough and that he should spend time with her not him. And FYI , my brother don't have much friends.

Then , when my brother started working , she started doing nonsense. Like she will check on my brother's hp. And what's the most horrible stuff she did was using her extra no. to sms to my brother acting as his colleague testing him. ( Ever since my brother was with her , he stopped contacting every single girl he knows and my bro usually don't talk much to girls also..)

I don't understand why she always think that my brother is hiding something from her.. To the extend that she uses my brother phone to reply to his best friend's message to check whether there's something on that she doesn't know. HOW TERRIBLE ? she's 25 mind you. I don't even do such things to my boyfriend (i'm 19 fyi) !!!

She don't allow my brother to go out with his colleagues also. It was my brother's 1st job.So his colleagues had a last min outing . My brother wanna be in good terms with them. And so , he went. He told his gf about this last min outing and she's throwing trantrum .. saying that she took leave that day just to spend the time with him. Correct , but you see , he can go out with her anytime but not the colleagues ah. she fails to understand. Now my brother starts to feel unbreathable. Thanks to her. Poor thing.

goofyzell SG

Something similar to what is happening to my brother. He's currently 25 this yr and his gf is the same age as him.

erm... my gf respects our private space and she dun like to meet so often...

TTFU SG

Something similar to what is happening to my brother. He's currently 25 this yr and his gf is the same age as him.

The girl got to trust your bro more. Not as if your bro really goes around flirting with girls making her feel uneasy. When things like that happen, the best is cut it out directly and have some period to think through, continue or dont conti

jojobeach SG

People, stop letting yourself be used and abused.

Those who uses their "past hurt" as an excuse to behave like they are some wounded animals are just.. manipulators.

It's just their means of controlling you.

If they havn't get over their "horrid" past yet, then they really shouldn't be in any relationship at all.

So leave those "fake hurt" people alone until they get their head out of their arse.

Deperados will run to their "aid" trying to be a "hero", then just take the trashing like one and stop your complaining. Because you deserved it.

jojobeach SG

erm... my gf respects our private space and she dun like to meet so often...

She is keeping you on a LONG leash while she goes looking for her prince charming.

You're just her fall back, so don't be stupid thinking you have a very special place in her heart.

When she finds one she really like, she'll not treat him like the way she is treating you now.

Go and find yourself another gal, and stop being such a moron.

goofyzell SG

She is keeping you on a LONG leash while she goes looking for her prince charming.

You're just her fall back, so don't be stupid thinking you have a very special place in her heart.

When she finds one she really like, she'll not treat him like the way she is treating you now.

Go and find yourself another gal, and stop being such a moron.

I dunno about this but 1 thing I do know is that if I dun a place in her heart, she wont pull me back when I am leaving. She wont even think of marriage in 2, 3 years time.

I dun need to be the special one. Just need her to know if I am the right one will do. She has been very hurt b4 and I have nursed her back to a better state. I plan to do this all the way until she is completely ok.

TTFU SG

I dunno about this but 1 thing I do know is that if I dun a place in her heart, she wont pull me back when I am leaving. She wont even think of marriage in 2, 3 years time.

This is never easy, as you dono about the other partys heart. Good luck to your one sided sacrifice. In the end if your sacrifice doesnt pay off, you will be hurted, Just that simple.

goofyzell SG

This is never easy, as you dono about the other partys heart. Good luck to your one sided sacrifice. In the end if your sacrifice doesnt pay off, you will be hurted, Just that simple.

I understand.

Thats why she does not wanna commit now. She said 2, 3 years which is good enough for her to decide if I am the right one for her.

Her mum told me she has had a talk with her. Her mum said that she dun dare commit as she is afraid. She is afraid I will not be as nice to her after marriage, we will change heart(变心), etc etc...

Her mum also said just give her more time as she tries to talk to her again over time...

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