reading this thread, i had to create an account and give my
2cents.
i agree. why? because i'm doing what he's doing.
in the past year since my ex (my first, and so far, only
love) left me .. and which she rightfully did (let's
just say i wasn't the best bf) .. i have dated/slept with more
girls than i care to remember. some i wined and dined, others i
knew no more than hours. quickly, i developed a sense of
self-awareness: i was, and still am, chasing the shadow of my
ex.
the difference between me and him lies in that once i find
better, or realise that the girl i'm currently with has XXX
flaw (in comparison to my ex), i move forward and don't look back.
he, on the other hand, seems to feel the need to be in a constant
state of attachment - and that's where you come in. you're his
backup. the one girl he knows he can manipulate with ease. i
too keep in my black book a list of girls who i know i
can have my way with anytime, although, i have yet
to feel a need to call any of them. the best .. rather,
the only way to save yourself further heartache, is to cut all
contact by keeping out of his sight, any trace of you.
here's what i do - take some notes: i keep 2 numbers: 1 for my
circle of trust, 1 to sian charboh. the former is permanent and the
latter is by all accounts temporary - with each girl, goes the
number associated with her. pre-paid lines are cheap and easy
to obtain. on the rare occassion they wilfully
disregard my unilateral breakup, and show up at my door,
i get my family/maid to turn them away - after sufficient time,
they'll just stop coming/waiting.
they say the amount of time needed to properly mourn the loss of
a r'ship is half the period for which the r'ship continued. i've
still got another year to continue my ways - or at least, that's
the excuse i give. but what's sickening, is that i don't see an end
in sight and have come to accept it as part and parcel of my life.
sucks to be you if he is like me. good luck, and do right to
yourself.
p.s.: think back and reflect upon the kind of person he was.
you'll see there's very little beyond the sweet words and the money
spent (that is, on dating you). both of which can be
dispensed with relative ease (i'm assuming he has capacity).
chances are, you'll also find that he's a great actor,
and someone who can play to the crowd .. wh3th3r the g1rlg1rl
likezz this patternz de, or the witty gentleman a lady seeks, he
can be both, simultaneously.
edit: forgot to add, girl that initiates contact - che-ching!
50% end in ONS. girl that continously initiates contact after i
distance myself - goes into my blackbook's "anytime-anywhere"
list.
Hi. Thanks for your advice. I serously hope he has moved on
already and is happy now.
